Logan has been working on his two michael jackson moves: the moonwalk and the slide turn. The moonwalk? He's got that down in that way where kids can do something clearly better than most people can, and you can see how they're not that far from how the pros do it.
The slide turn? He's got that down so well that it's almost eerie. It looks absolutely fabulous. Hard to describe these things in text, but next time you see him, ask him to show you.
He played basketball today in the Highland vs. Highland game. His elementary school has two teams in the rec league. His team lost, but he scored 3. For the past several games, he's scored 1 out of every 5 of the team's points. So, he's holding his own very nicely.
I think if we work at it in the off-season, he has a shot at making a travel team. At his age, he's like a sponge. Give him a little practice and he improves by leaps and bounds week to week.
Took the LSAT today and it was interesting. I didn't do as well as I had hoped. There were a total of 5 multiple choice sections. The first? I only answered about 20 of the 25 questions. I just took too long with a few of the harder questions earlier on.
The second through fourth section, I did great. Finished each one with time to spare. In fact, one of them, I had about 10 minutes to spare.
The last section, I didn't do well at all. It's the one where they spell out a scenario. Like, "A city has two plow trucks. They have to plow Jones, Main, Second street, etc..." Then, they spell out a bunch of rules. "The truck that plows Jones has to plow Main immediately afterwards. The truck that plows Second street also has to plow Maple..."
Then, they ask questions like, "If plow truck #2 plows Maple as the 2nd street on its route, which of the following is impossible: a. Truck #1 plowed Main Street. B. Truck #1 plowed Second street..."
I only answered about 10 of the 25 questions, so that was a farging disaster.
I guess if I really did poorly, I could always take the test again. I am pretty sure I did well enough on the other sections that I got an overall good score, but probably something like 80th percentile, instead of 95th.
Now, all I can do is wait for the result.
Oh, and three things sort of hacked me off today.
First, at one point, you have to show a proctor an ID. I presented my military ID. At which point, the proctor said, "What's this? Where's your driver's license? I don't think you can use this."
I said, "No, it says on the LSAT materials that a military ID is fine."
Then, a woman behind me chimed in, "Yeah, any photo ID is acceptable."
(Ummm... no, woman, it isn't. I also don't recall asking for your help.)
Finally, begrudgingly, the proctor accepted my military ID.
She was a cranky old bird. There were two other proctors and they were awesome.
Later, I had just finished the 3rd section of the test. After the 3rd section, you get a 15 minute break.
However, I had like 10 minutes to go before time ran out. So, you can go to the restroom if you raise your hand. We entered the auditorium at 8:30, and at this point, it was like 11:45.
The cranky bird came over. "I need to use the restroom."
She said, "It's almost time for the break."
I said, "Well, the break isn't for another 10 minutes."
In as agitated a manner as possible, she acquiesced. "Go!"
I mean, 10 minutes, not that big of a deal, but I knew it wasn't like they were going to spring us the second the section was over. They had to gather up all the tests and secure them, etc. It was going to be 20 minutes, minimum.
Besides, it was boring as balls to just sit there once you finished a section.
The other minor annoyance was a guy behind me who was hacking up a lung. Sounded like the damned TB ward. It was irritating, but for the most part, I was able to tune it out.
Worse than that was some corpulent **** in front of me who kept farting. Nasty, nasty ones, like he ate beans and sauerkraut the night before. Good lord, dude.
That probably did distract me a few times but ultimately, I doubt it affected my score.
Like I said, there were 5 multiple choice sections, but one of them isn't going to be graded. Apparently, the LSAT people use that section to evaluate questions for future tests. If it turns out that the section I didn't finish is the one they don't grade, that'll be great. I do know that the section I only finished half of is one that will be graded, since it was the only section with those style of logic problems on it.
Lastly, we had to do a writing sample. We were presented with a story, and we had to chose one of two possible positions on the story and write an essay espousing that position vis a vis a couple of decision criteria. In theory, you should have been able to chose either positions and they were both equally valid.
From what I was reading, though, one of the choices was clearly superior to the other. I had to keep re-reading the scenario a few times to make sure I wasn't missing something.
In any event, the writing sample isn't graded. It's simply forwarded to the schools you're applying to on the off chance that they care.
I had to hand-write the thing in pencil, but I finished the whole thing in 15 minutes, max.
Now, I guess I just wait. It takes approximately 3 weeks to get your results back. I did so poorly on that logic section that I thought about cancelling my score, but again, I'm going to take the chance that it's good enough, even if it wasn't my best effort.
Business has been pretty good lately. We have a lot of A/R and WIP and the A/R is maturing into cash on an almost daily basis. At the rate we're going, we have work lined up through March and maybe April, too. That's as good as things get in this business.
We've pretty much turned our corner and we just need a string of good months to get healthy.
I also have a potential buyer coming to look at the business. The timing isn't exactly perfect, but honestly, it isn't all that bad. I don't like the trends in the industry, though my franchisor is particularly strong. Mostly, I really need to do something else. One big change in the past 6 years is that my franchise is essentially non-scalable, now.
Used to be that you bought one territory, developed it, bought another, developed it, etc. They had a business plan that eventually had you with 4 territories, debt-free and fully-managed (meaning you were divorced from day-to-day operations.)
They are clearly going 180 degrees in the opposite direction, now. They clearly want each owner to own one territory and squeeze all they can out of that.
If they had been like this when I was evaluating businesses, I wouldn't have bought. Scalability was near the top of my list of criteria.
Heck, even if you own a haircut place and only pull out $20 or 30K a year, that's not a problem so long as you own 10 of the suckers, with plans to eventually own 20 or 30 of them.
If you can't scale-up, though, it's too much like just buying a job. I made six figures back when I had a job. I also didn't have the downside risk of months of losing money, either. So, if I'm going to have a job, I'm not going to have my net-worth tied up into it with the potential to have to sell off all my guitars every three or four years.
I won't panic sell my biz. They'll still have to pay up to get it, but if they meet my number, it won't bother me to sell. Of course, I'll have to figure out what I'll do next, but that's not a problem.
My general philosophy of life is that it's a shame it's so short. There are so many things I'd like to do that I just won't ever have the time to try.
Saturday, February 12, 2011
Thursday, February 10, 2011
Timing is Everything...
Now that the business is almost back on solid footing, I feel like I can start playing offense, instead of playing defense. Playing defense isn't much fun, and I've been doing it for 2 years, now.
Now that things are moving forward, I have two basic goals in the business.
1. To buy some real estate
2. To diversify the business holdings
For all sorts of reasons, the diversification is a good idea. If nothing else, these past 2 years have shown me that having all your eggs in one basket is great when the basket is doing well. When it's not, you don't have any eggs left.
As for real estate, I'm a bit bummed. There was a piece of property that I absolutely am in love with. The location is good. It's a huge office building and a huge warehouse that used to be a motor sports dealership.
The dealership went out of business years ago. However, when I'd inquire about buying, it was obvious that the owners were in pretty deep and were holding out trying to get a price that would get them healthy again. They were asking about $2 million for a property I would have thought might be worth $1.
Now, it's RE-owned, and the whole shebang is going for about $900,000. Worth every penny, if you ask me. The offices are expensive. In fact, it's really meant to be home to two companies. It's got 4 conference rooms and tons of really good looking, impressive space.
Of course, I can't buy. I don't have the money for a down payment and it'll be at least a year of digging out, maybe two, before I'm no longer in a hole.
Granted, the same forces that probably conspired to make this thing RE-owned in the first place are what decimated my business. The economy has sucked for everybody. Still, this one would have been nice.
I just signed a two year lease, too. So, who knows. I can try to line up my ducks and see if the place is still available two years from now. In the mean time, all I can do is remind myself that a lot of nice commercial property is coming on line.
It sure would be nice if I could get back into the position I was in way back in mid-2009. Life was good back then. In the mean time, I'm just doing what I can to not act shell-shocked by the ride I've been on (and am still going through.)
Now that things are moving forward, I have two basic goals in the business.
1. To buy some real estate
2. To diversify the business holdings
For all sorts of reasons, the diversification is a good idea. If nothing else, these past 2 years have shown me that having all your eggs in one basket is great when the basket is doing well. When it's not, you don't have any eggs left.
As for real estate, I'm a bit bummed. There was a piece of property that I absolutely am in love with. The location is good. It's a huge office building and a huge warehouse that used to be a motor sports dealership.
The dealership went out of business years ago. However, when I'd inquire about buying, it was obvious that the owners were in pretty deep and were holding out trying to get a price that would get them healthy again. They were asking about $2 million for a property I would have thought might be worth $1.
Now, it's RE-owned, and the whole shebang is going for about $900,000. Worth every penny, if you ask me. The offices are expensive. In fact, it's really meant to be home to two companies. It's got 4 conference rooms and tons of really good looking, impressive space.
Of course, I can't buy. I don't have the money for a down payment and it'll be at least a year of digging out, maybe two, before I'm no longer in a hole.
Granted, the same forces that probably conspired to make this thing RE-owned in the first place are what decimated my business. The economy has sucked for everybody. Still, this one would have been nice.
I just signed a two year lease, too. So, who knows. I can try to line up my ducks and see if the place is still available two years from now. In the mean time, all I can do is remind myself that a lot of nice commercial property is coming on line.
It sure would be nice if I could get back into the position I was in way back in mid-2009. Life was good back then. In the mean time, I'm just doing what I can to not act shell-shocked by the ride I've been on (and am still going through.)
Thursday, February 3, 2011
The Child Abuse Blog Post
Interesting evening last night. Logan is on a huge Michael Jackson kick, so I rented a DVD of the TV miniseries "The Jacksons, An American Dream".
Michael Jackson is a bit of a delicate topic, in my opinion. So, as I describe his talent and drive in the most glowing terms possible, I also point out that Michael was an absolute mess. Logan asks why, and I point out that at least some of it can be traced back to an abusive childhood. His Dad was just plain mean.
Although it appears to have stopped short of coming to blows, his father clearly believed in whipping the boys with a switch and in a scene or two, things degenerate into a shoving match.
Later, in a scene in Friday Night Lights, one of the parents of a High School student strikes his son several times.
I also heard an absolutely heart-wrenching account on "This American Life" by a man who had been molested as a child. Actually, "molested" is putting it too mildly. He was just flat-out raped.
One of the tools his rapist used was telling him that if he told his parents that his parents would be angry with the child, or somesuch.
So, there are two things I wanted my son to know.
The first was that nobody is allowed to hurt him.
I said it to him in those words. "Nobody is allowed to hurt you, Logan. Nobody is allowed to punch you or harm you in any way. If anybody says they're going to hurt you, find an adult and have them contact me right away."
The second is something that's going to take some subtlety to let him know. I want him to know that he can always come to me, with anything. When he's a teenager, I want him to know that I draw a hard line about driving if he's been drinking, or getting into a car with somebody who has been drinking. However, hand-in-hand with that, I need him to know he can call me at any hour, day or night, and I'll come get him.
Yeah, I'd rather he didn't drink, and I'd really rather he didn't drink to excess. However, that desire is much smaller than my desire that he not place his life, or the lives of others, in jeopardy.
If anybody tried to hurt him, I'd want him to know that no matter what they say, that he can always come to me afterwards.
Kids are, by nature, naive and easily manipulated. I just need to make sure that he knows that the real perspective on this is: heaven help anybody foolish enough to **** with my child. I haven't spent this much of my life gaining proficiency with weaponry to sit back and let somebody hurt my boy.
He said, "Dad, you told me it's okay for me to defend myself if somebody attacks me."
Yes, son. That's if the kid is about your size. But if they're a lot bigger, you run and get an adult and tell them to call me.
I had to tell him a little bit about bullies a bit earlier than I would have liked to because we used to have a neighbor who was more than a little bit violent. Unfortunately, a different neighbor kid was smaller in stature than the bully and the bully used to pick on him. It resulted in me having a very short fuse with the bully and sending him home almost every time he came over to play.
The kids were young back then. Logan was maybe 4, and the bully was about 5. However, I told him, "Logan if X ever hits you, you punch him in the face as hard as you possibly can. You do whatever you have to do to hurt him."
Logan said, "I will, Dad."
I said, "he may still punch you, but you have to hit him hard."
When I said that, it sort of scared Logan. He was too young to want to be punched.
The reality in that case, though, is that a bully doesn't want somebody who is going to fight back, even if the bully can take him. If some kid bloodies the bully's nose, he will find somebody else to pick on next time.
(As an aside, my concerns were probably not very well founded. I remember one day when the bully kid and is brother came over to play. I eventually heard he and Logan screaming at each other and the bully left the house, all angry.
I asked what in the world happened and the brother said, "Logan punched him in the head."
I said, "Logan get up here, what in the world is going on?"
The brother said, "They were boxing".
Apparently, they found some of my old sparring gear and were boxing. The neighbor bully left when Logan caught him with a good one.)
With genuine child abuse, though, or a bully that's entirely too old for Logan to handle, there's nothing he can do to help the situation. He needs to call a parent.
I don't believe in corporal punishment. I didn't oppose it until Logan was born and it became obvious to me that there were so many other ways to handle discipline that smacking a little kid just wasn't necessary.
If I'm not going to lay a hand on my kid, nobody else is allowed to either. I just want to make sure he's got that clear in his mind, too. It's just never okay to physically harm a child, and he needs to know that he's entitled to that protection.
Michael Jackson is a bit of a delicate topic, in my opinion. So, as I describe his talent and drive in the most glowing terms possible, I also point out that Michael was an absolute mess. Logan asks why, and I point out that at least some of it can be traced back to an abusive childhood. His Dad was just plain mean.
Although it appears to have stopped short of coming to blows, his father clearly believed in whipping the boys with a switch and in a scene or two, things degenerate into a shoving match.
Later, in a scene in Friday Night Lights, one of the parents of a High School student strikes his son several times.
I also heard an absolutely heart-wrenching account on "This American Life" by a man who had been molested as a child. Actually, "molested" is putting it too mildly. He was just flat-out raped.
One of the tools his rapist used was telling him that if he told his parents that his parents would be angry with the child, or somesuch.
So, there are two things I wanted my son to know.
The first was that nobody is allowed to hurt him.
I said it to him in those words. "Nobody is allowed to hurt you, Logan. Nobody is allowed to punch you or harm you in any way. If anybody says they're going to hurt you, find an adult and have them contact me right away."
The second is something that's going to take some subtlety to let him know. I want him to know that he can always come to me, with anything. When he's a teenager, I want him to know that I draw a hard line about driving if he's been drinking, or getting into a car with somebody who has been drinking. However, hand-in-hand with that, I need him to know he can call me at any hour, day or night, and I'll come get him.
Yeah, I'd rather he didn't drink, and I'd really rather he didn't drink to excess. However, that desire is much smaller than my desire that he not place his life, or the lives of others, in jeopardy.
If anybody tried to hurt him, I'd want him to know that no matter what they say, that he can always come to me afterwards.
Kids are, by nature, naive and easily manipulated. I just need to make sure that he knows that the real perspective on this is: heaven help anybody foolish enough to **** with my child. I haven't spent this much of my life gaining proficiency with weaponry to sit back and let somebody hurt my boy.
He said, "Dad, you told me it's okay for me to defend myself if somebody attacks me."
Yes, son. That's if the kid is about your size. But if they're a lot bigger, you run and get an adult and tell them to call me.
I had to tell him a little bit about bullies a bit earlier than I would have liked to because we used to have a neighbor who was more than a little bit violent. Unfortunately, a different neighbor kid was smaller in stature than the bully and the bully used to pick on him. It resulted in me having a very short fuse with the bully and sending him home almost every time he came over to play.
The kids were young back then. Logan was maybe 4, and the bully was about 5. However, I told him, "Logan if X ever hits you, you punch him in the face as hard as you possibly can. You do whatever you have to do to hurt him."
Logan said, "I will, Dad."
I said, "he may still punch you, but you have to hit him hard."
When I said that, it sort of scared Logan. He was too young to want to be punched.
The reality in that case, though, is that a bully doesn't want somebody who is going to fight back, even if the bully can take him. If some kid bloodies the bully's nose, he will find somebody else to pick on next time.
(As an aside, my concerns were probably not very well founded. I remember one day when the bully kid and is brother came over to play. I eventually heard he and Logan screaming at each other and the bully left the house, all angry.
I asked what in the world happened and the brother said, "Logan punched him in the head."
I said, "Logan get up here, what in the world is going on?"
The brother said, "They were boxing".
Apparently, they found some of my old sparring gear and were boxing. The neighbor bully left when Logan caught him with a good one.)
With genuine child abuse, though, or a bully that's entirely too old for Logan to handle, there's nothing he can do to help the situation. He needs to call a parent.
I don't believe in corporal punishment. I didn't oppose it until Logan was born and it became obvious to me that there were so many other ways to handle discipline that smacking a little kid just wasn't necessary.
If I'm not going to lay a hand on my kid, nobody else is allowed to either. I just want to make sure he's got that clear in his mind, too. It's just never okay to physically harm a child, and he needs to know that he's entitled to that protection.
Tuesday, February 1, 2011
The Everything and Your Momma Blog Post
Been meaning to post for a while, but haven't gotten around to it. It's not that I don't have stuff to blog about, it's more like I have too much to blog about.
Work is busy these days, which is good. We need quite a few strong months to help us recover from a whole lot of bad ones. Seems like we're turning a corner, but the trouble with disasters is that you can't predict when they'll happen. For the time being, we appear to be crawling out of the hole somewhat.
The more I do this, the more I'm sure that it takes a special kind of person to be an entrepreneur. The level of uncertainty is enough to make you crazy. Especially a business like mine that has seen highs and lows, it can really test your fortitude over time.
When things were running straight up, it was a joy. Not so fun on the way down. Now, though, let's hope we're finally rightsized and have some good times ahead. Both me and my guys could use a little blue sky (economically).
Logan started workouts for the Spring travel season. It feels like he's an old pro at this. Hard to believe last year was his first year of it. I remember when the season started, remarking, "Boy, the difference in these kids after the off-season program is astounding. There's no comparison between this and where they were at the end of rec last year."
Another Dad who had an older son said that by the end of the season, they'd improve just as much, and they really had.
They came to this season's workouts even better than I remember them being. Logan has moved up to a 19 ounce bat, and is swinging it really well. We had a devil of a time finding the right bat for him last year. I bet I spent $1,000 in the quest for exacalibur. One of the bats I bought is the one he's using now, though.
His throwing has improved tremendously. I hope he gets to work out with the pitchers this year. I've mentioned to the coach that he would like to pitch. We'll just see where it goes from there.
His batting has moved up a notch as well. He spent a lot of time with a hitting coach in the off-season and right now, his swing is pretty amazing.
I can't wait for the season to begin.
Logan is crazy about basketball right now because that's what he's playing. In the off-season I will try to sign him up for camps and other activities. He's got a lot of room for improvement in basketball, but he also has a lot of potential.
I don't want to push him into things, but I don't want him to fall short of his potential due to lack of guidance and support, either.
I am thinking a lot about his life after High School. Yes, he's only 9, but I'm his dad. I was looking at tuition and it looks like Ohio State is probably going to be our best bet. He'll have to work to get in. However, it's not unattainable.
He's been in love with the idea of going to OSU for about as long as he could talk. It'd be great if that's where he goes.
He asked me the other day if I thought he could ever play professional sports. Tough question, that. On the one hand, yeah, I know, the adult answer is that it's about like winning the lottery. If you added up the NFL, MLB and NBA players, you'd be talking about less than 2,000 guys. And they're recruited from all over the world.
So, frankly, getting into any of those at the professional level involves, in my opinion, exceptional athletic ability, combined with an exceptional work-ethic and probably a little bit of cheating with whatever performance enhancing drugs are being used at the time.
The reason I don't want to quash that dream, though, is not because I believe he will be a professional athlete, but because I believe that if sports is something he loves, he owes it to himself to be as good as he can possibly be.
If he aims for the NBA, and puts all his effort into basketball, and only plays High School basketball, that's farther than he would have gone without dedication and drive. He'd always have that to look back on fondly.
I think sometimes it doesn't matter so much what, exactly, you steer your kids into, but that the things they do are opportunities for you to teach them life lessons. First, to keep trying, even when things get hard. Second, that it takes hard work to achieve anything worthwhile. Third, that they should do what it takes to do the things they do well.
If Logan loved, say, airplanes, I'd do what I could to steer him that way. If he loved music, he'd have it made because there's almost no extreme I wouldn't go to in order to help him achieve that way.
The kid is just a jock. What can you say? I'm as surprised as you are. Given my (lack of) athletic ability, it's a little surprising that my kid would be athletic. He benefits from being built more like his mother, though. Long limbed and well built. One way or another, he's really got good skills. And any discussion of this would be incomplete if I didn't mention that he's always been absolutely the youngest kid on any team he's ever been on.
So, as long as he does sports, I want him to do them well, and I want to help him in any way I can.
Next year, we'll have tackle football, too. He's really looking forward to that.
Main focus this year, though, will be basketball. I need to get in shape, anyway, and I can do a lot of workouts with him in hoops.
So, the travel season is at hand. There's just nothing like it. It's a phenomenal experience.
Time keeps marching and with every month, my debt drops little by little and I manage to keep my head above water. Granted, I'd like more, but in this economy, I'll take it.
Work is busy these days, which is good. We need quite a few strong months to help us recover from a whole lot of bad ones. Seems like we're turning a corner, but the trouble with disasters is that you can't predict when they'll happen. For the time being, we appear to be crawling out of the hole somewhat.
The more I do this, the more I'm sure that it takes a special kind of person to be an entrepreneur. The level of uncertainty is enough to make you crazy. Especially a business like mine that has seen highs and lows, it can really test your fortitude over time.
When things were running straight up, it was a joy. Not so fun on the way down. Now, though, let's hope we're finally rightsized and have some good times ahead. Both me and my guys could use a little blue sky (economically).
Logan started workouts for the Spring travel season. It feels like he's an old pro at this. Hard to believe last year was his first year of it. I remember when the season started, remarking, "Boy, the difference in these kids after the off-season program is astounding. There's no comparison between this and where they were at the end of rec last year."
Another Dad who had an older son said that by the end of the season, they'd improve just as much, and they really had.
They came to this season's workouts even better than I remember them being. Logan has moved up to a 19 ounce bat, and is swinging it really well. We had a devil of a time finding the right bat for him last year. I bet I spent $1,000 in the quest for exacalibur. One of the bats I bought is the one he's using now, though.
His throwing has improved tremendously. I hope he gets to work out with the pitchers this year. I've mentioned to the coach that he would like to pitch. We'll just see where it goes from there.
His batting has moved up a notch as well. He spent a lot of time with a hitting coach in the off-season and right now, his swing is pretty amazing.
I can't wait for the season to begin.
Logan is crazy about basketball right now because that's what he's playing. In the off-season I will try to sign him up for camps and other activities. He's got a lot of room for improvement in basketball, but he also has a lot of potential.
I don't want to push him into things, but I don't want him to fall short of his potential due to lack of guidance and support, either.
I am thinking a lot about his life after High School. Yes, he's only 9, but I'm his dad. I was looking at tuition and it looks like Ohio State is probably going to be our best bet. He'll have to work to get in. However, it's not unattainable.
He's been in love with the idea of going to OSU for about as long as he could talk. It'd be great if that's where he goes.
He asked me the other day if I thought he could ever play professional sports. Tough question, that. On the one hand, yeah, I know, the adult answer is that it's about like winning the lottery. If you added up the NFL, MLB and NBA players, you'd be talking about less than 2,000 guys. And they're recruited from all over the world.
So, frankly, getting into any of those at the professional level involves, in my opinion, exceptional athletic ability, combined with an exceptional work-ethic and probably a little bit of cheating with whatever performance enhancing drugs are being used at the time.
The reason I don't want to quash that dream, though, is not because I believe he will be a professional athlete, but because I believe that if sports is something he loves, he owes it to himself to be as good as he can possibly be.
If he aims for the NBA, and puts all his effort into basketball, and only plays High School basketball, that's farther than he would have gone without dedication and drive. He'd always have that to look back on fondly.
I think sometimes it doesn't matter so much what, exactly, you steer your kids into, but that the things they do are opportunities for you to teach them life lessons. First, to keep trying, even when things get hard. Second, that it takes hard work to achieve anything worthwhile. Third, that they should do what it takes to do the things they do well.
If Logan loved, say, airplanes, I'd do what I could to steer him that way. If he loved music, he'd have it made because there's almost no extreme I wouldn't go to in order to help him achieve that way.
The kid is just a jock. What can you say? I'm as surprised as you are. Given my (lack of) athletic ability, it's a little surprising that my kid would be athletic. He benefits from being built more like his mother, though. Long limbed and well built. One way or another, he's really got good skills. And any discussion of this would be incomplete if I didn't mention that he's always been absolutely the youngest kid on any team he's ever been on.
So, as long as he does sports, I want him to do them well, and I want to help him in any way I can.
Next year, we'll have tackle football, too. He's really looking forward to that.
Main focus this year, though, will be basketball. I need to get in shape, anyway, and I can do a lot of workouts with him in hoops.
So, the travel season is at hand. There's just nothing like it. It's a phenomenal experience.
Time keeps marching and with every month, my debt drops little by little and I manage to keep my head above water. Granted, I'd like more, but in this economy, I'll take it.
Tuesday, January 25, 2011
Why I'm Pissed after the State of the Union Address
Okay, off the top of my head, here are the things that have me completely hacked off and ready to move to Canada:
1. Michelle Bachman, in the Tea Party response, blamed the jump in unemployment on Obama. Good lord, is she kidding? The surge in unemployment is due to Bush, Clinton, Paulson, Geithner and predominantly Republican Congresses doing all they could to make sure Wall Street could steal all they could carry. Our unemployment rate isn't Obama's fault. It's mostly Republicans' fault.
2. The Republicans have got to stop trying to repeal Obamacare. Seriously. Yes, Barack Obama was a complete and total moron to spend the first year of his presidency to produce such an idiotic and worthless bill. It accomplishes next to nothing. It does nothing whatsoever, to address the real problem with health care in the United States: unrestrained costs that are completely out of line with what the rest of the world pays. HOWEVER, it accomplishes NEXT TO nothing, but it didn't accomplish nothing. There are a few good things in there.
The fight to repeal it would be nearly as stupid as the fight to pass such a watered down, corrupted bill in the first place.
At this point, the damage is done. Obama fiddled with health care while America burned, but it's done. Obama is right: fix it, amend it, make it better. It was a stupid thing for him to do, and it's part of the reason he lost the House of Representatives. He took his lumps, let's all move on.
Yes, parts of it need to be repealed, like... oh... the mandates that the administration is currently exempting all the unions from. Typical Washington games: rules are rules, unless you're Wall Street or a union.
Unless the Republicans are going to address costs, then whatever they have to say on the issue is completely worthless.
The Republicans havevery few good ideas on health care. The biggest problem with Obamacare was that he wasn't big-government, enough. It was that he wasn't far enough to the left.
We need a single payer system so we can negotiate prices that are the same as the rest of the world pays. Until that happens, health care providers and pharma are going to do exactly what Wall Street is doing: stealing all they can until the country collapses.
3. Obama was all full of praise for the brothers in Michigan who got government money and started making solar panels. Oh, come on. We're supposed to celebrate that another formerly free-market company realized that the best way to make money is to stop pulling the wagon and jump into it, instead? That the formula for success is to get money from the government? That's not reinvention. If anything, that's EXACTLY what's wrong with America right now.
4. We have 1 in 6, or more likely 1 in 5 Americans who can't find good jobs right now. We have farging problems. These idiots are all together giving standing ovations to a barely competent president while real Americans are sufferring. Glad you think the state of the union is strong, Mr. President, but I am sort of curious what planet you live on.
5. Why in the world is everybody chosing NOW to try and cut spending? Honestly people, this is not the time. Of all the things to have bipartisan agreement on, this is downright nuts.
6. Pretty obvious that when Wall Street needs help, the federal government will mobilize any amount of money, with no conditions and give it to them as fast as possible so they won't have to suffer. However, when it comes to rescuing main street? Hey, it happens when it happens. No urgency at all.
If we put 1/10th the resources into rescuing Main Street that we did with Wall Street, it'd be a whole different picture, now.
Heck, if we did 1/10th as much for Main Street as we're doing for Wall Street RIGHT NOW, it'd be a whole 'nother ball game. Imagine if ordinary Americans were able to borrow money at 0.1% interest. Imagine if ordinary Americans were allowed to be completely insolvent, yet still operate businesses? Imagine if ordinary Americans could lend money to the federal government for more interest than they were paying the fed, and imagine if ordinary Americans made money just for handling the transaction?
We should replace, "e pluribus unum" with "everything for wall street, no matter the cost... the rest can eat cake."
I'm sad to say that I've reached a point where I'm completely disgusted with the United States of America. I'll raise my son here, but after that, if I could move to Canada, I would.
I will continue to serve in the Navy for a little while longer, but if things don't improve, and I doubt they will, I won't be putting my ass on the line for a country that exists solely for the benefit of a bunch of Wall Street bankers. I'm not going to sacrifice my life for a bunch of guys who don't even think they should have to sacrifice a bonus for a problem they, themselves created.
We are so screwed. They're actually destroying our country.
1. Michelle Bachman, in the Tea Party response, blamed the jump in unemployment on Obama. Good lord, is she kidding? The surge in unemployment is due to Bush, Clinton, Paulson, Geithner and predominantly Republican Congresses doing all they could to make sure Wall Street could steal all they could carry. Our unemployment rate isn't Obama's fault. It's mostly Republicans' fault.
2. The Republicans have got to stop trying to repeal Obamacare. Seriously. Yes, Barack Obama was a complete and total moron to spend the first year of his presidency to produce such an idiotic and worthless bill. It accomplishes next to nothing. It does nothing whatsoever, to address the real problem with health care in the United States: unrestrained costs that are completely out of line with what the rest of the world pays. HOWEVER, it accomplishes NEXT TO nothing, but it didn't accomplish nothing. There are a few good things in there.
The fight to repeal it would be nearly as stupid as the fight to pass such a watered down, corrupted bill in the first place.
At this point, the damage is done. Obama fiddled with health care while America burned, but it's done. Obama is right: fix it, amend it, make it better. It was a stupid thing for him to do, and it's part of the reason he lost the House of Representatives. He took his lumps, let's all move on.
Yes, parts of it need to be repealed, like... oh... the mandates that the administration is currently exempting all the unions from. Typical Washington games: rules are rules, unless you're Wall Street or a union.
Unless the Republicans are going to address costs, then whatever they have to say on the issue is completely worthless.
The Republicans havevery few good ideas on health care. The biggest problem with Obamacare was that he wasn't big-government, enough. It was that he wasn't far enough to the left.
We need a single payer system so we can negotiate prices that are the same as the rest of the world pays. Until that happens, health care providers and pharma are going to do exactly what Wall Street is doing: stealing all they can until the country collapses.
3. Obama was all full of praise for the brothers in Michigan who got government money and started making solar panels. Oh, come on. We're supposed to celebrate that another formerly free-market company realized that the best way to make money is to stop pulling the wagon and jump into it, instead? That the formula for success is to get money from the government? That's not reinvention. If anything, that's EXACTLY what's wrong with America right now.
4. We have 1 in 6, or more likely 1 in 5 Americans who can't find good jobs right now. We have farging problems. These idiots are all together giving standing ovations to a barely competent president while real Americans are sufferring. Glad you think the state of the union is strong, Mr. President, but I am sort of curious what planet you live on.
5. Why in the world is everybody chosing NOW to try and cut spending? Honestly people, this is not the time. Of all the things to have bipartisan agreement on, this is downright nuts.
6. Pretty obvious that when Wall Street needs help, the federal government will mobilize any amount of money, with no conditions and give it to them as fast as possible so they won't have to suffer. However, when it comes to rescuing main street? Hey, it happens when it happens. No urgency at all.
If we put 1/10th the resources into rescuing Main Street that we did with Wall Street, it'd be a whole different picture, now.
Heck, if we did 1/10th as much for Main Street as we're doing for Wall Street RIGHT NOW, it'd be a whole 'nother ball game. Imagine if ordinary Americans were able to borrow money at 0.1% interest. Imagine if ordinary Americans were allowed to be completely insolvent, yet still operate businesses? Imagine if ordinary Americans could lend money to the federal government for more interest than they were paying the fed, and imagine if ordinary Americans made money just for handling the transaction?
We should replace, "e pluribus unum" with "everything for wall street, no matter the cost... the rest can eat cake."
I'm sad to say that I've reached a point where I'm completely disgusted with the United States of America. I'll raise my son here, but after that, if I could move to Canada, I would.
I will continue to serve in the Navy for a little while longer, but if things don't improve, and I doubt they will, I won't be putting my ass on the line for a country that exists solely for the benefit of a bunch of Wall Street bankers. I'm not going to sacrifice my life for a bunch of guys who don't even think they should have to sacrifice a bonus for a problem they, themselves created.
We are so screwed. They're actually destroying our country.
Monday, January 24, 2011
Douchebag neighbors, Bad weather and Good business...
I really don't like a few of my neighbors on the cul-de-sac. I've moved less than a block from my original home, but the cul-de-sac folks are really a breed apart.
One of my neighbors is a total douche. Comes over to complain whenever any little thing irritates him.
I figured we just needed to get to know each other. So, I saw his wife and him in the yard one day and after talking a little bit, asked if they'd like to see the inside of the house. (They had been asking about it and I was explaining that it was being remodelled.)
One of the rooms, we had just taken out some wrought-iron crap. The wife took one peek and said, "Oh, you can give me those. I'll use them in my garden."
That really rubbed me the wrong way. Like, "I don't know you very well, but listen while I tell you how you're going to give me stuff." If my other interactions with them had been more positive, it probably wouldn't have bothered me, but when your total interactions with a person either involve them bitching about something or asking for something that pretty much puts them on the douchebag list, IMHO.
I was chopping up some wood and he came over asking, "mind if I see what you're doing?" I felt like saying, "Well... yeah, I do. I don't think you need to see what I'm doing, and besides, I know that the only reason you're coming over here is to either bitch about something or ask for something, and neither of those are things I want to deal with."
So, he kept poking and prodding about the wood. Was I going to burn it all? I finally got the hint and said, "you're welcome to some of this wood if you want to burn it." His face brightened, until I added, "... all you have to do is come over here and split it yourself."
Dude is a total douche. The less I deal with him the better.
Today, I was snow-blowing my driveway and noticed a different neighbor standing across the street looking at me. After another pass, he hadn't moved. So, I stopped and asked, "do you need to speak with me?"
He said, "Generally, we don't blow snow into the street after the plow trucks come. You should get one of these (points to some idiotic extra-wide snow shovel he's using.)"
Now, first, I do blow snow into the street, but if it's obvious that it's enough that it won't melt right away, I then go into the street and blow it back into my yard. I've done it before. I just hadn't gotten that far.
So, I said, "I usually clean off the street when I'm done" and went back to what I was doing. I'm not sure what he was expecting. It's sort of hard to clear the driveway without blowing at least a little snow into the street. I guess he figured I should clear the street before I blew snow onto it, or something.
Or maybe, just maybe, some people are just absolute douchebags who never learned that when you act like a total cock, it tends not to endear you to people.
In any event, I'm here until my son graduates from High School. Then, if everything works out, I'm going to live out my days on enough land that I won't ever see my neighbors.
Sometimes, they're awesome. In fact, most neighbors are. Sometimes, though, they can be a real pain in the ass.
The bad weather has come and for the first time in a long time, the business is really busy. If this keeps up, I'm rich again. However, I'll never take things for granted in this industry again. I'll also continue working on a solid Plan B, so that I won't be left high and dry if things go sour in this line of work.
Other than that, life is good. Logan is playing rec basketball and baseball workouts have begun. I'm doing well and starting to enjoy my house. I might put down a couple hundred bucks worth of carpet to last me until I can afford hardwood for the whole place, though.
One of my neighbors is a total douche. Comes over to complain whenever any little thing irritates him.
I figured we just needed to get to know each other. So, I saw his wife and him in the yard one day and after talking a little bit, asked if they'd like to see the inside of the house. (They had been asking about it and I was explaining that it was being remodelled.)
One of the rooms, we had just taken out some wrought-iron crap. The wife took one peek and said, "Oh, you can give me those. I'll use them in my garden."
That really rubbed me the wrong way. Like, "I don't know you very well, but listen while I tell you how you're going to give me stuff." If my other interactions with them had been more positive, it probably wouldn't have bothered me, but when your total interactions with a person either involve them bitching about something or asking for something that pretty much puts them on the douchebag list, IMHO.
I was chopping up some wood and he came over asking, "mind if I see what you're doing?" I felt like saying, "Well... yeah, I do. I don't think you need to see what I'm doing, and besides, I know that the only reason you're coming over here is to either bitch about something or ask for something, and neither of those are things I want to deal with."
So, he kept poking and prodding about the wood. Was I going to burn it all? I finally got the hint and said, "you're welcome to some of this wood if you want to burn it." His face brightened, until I added, "... all you have to do is come over here and split it yourself."
Dude is a total douche. The less I deal with him the better.
Today, I was snow-blowing my driveway and noticed a different neighbor standing across the street looking at me. After another pass, he hadn't moved. So, I stopped and asked, "do you need to speak with me?"
He said, "Generally, we don't blow snow into the street after the plow trucks come. You should get one of these (points to some idiotic extra-wide snow shovel he's using.)"
Now, first, I do blow snow into the street, but if it's obvious that it's enough that it won't melt right away, I then go into the street and blow it back into my yard. I've done it before. I just hadn't gotten that far.
So, I said, "I usually clean off the street when I'm done" and went back to what I was doing. I'm not sure what he was expecting. It's sort of hard to clear the driveway without blowing at least a little snow into the street. I guess he figured I should clear the street before I blew snow onto it, or something.
Or maybe, just maybe, some people are just absolute douchebags who never learned that when you act like a total cock, it tends not to endear you to people.
In any event, I'm here until my son graduates from High School. Then, if everything works out, I'm going to live out my days on enough land that I won't ever see my neighbors.
Sometimes, they're awesome. In fact, most neighbors are. Sometimes, though, they can be a real pain in the ass.
The bad weather has come and for the first time in a long time, the business is really busy. If this keeps up, I'm rich again. However, I'll never take things for granted in this industry again. I'll also continue working on a solid Plan B, so that I won't be left high and dry if things go sour in this line of work.
Other than that, life is good. Logan is playing rec basketball and baseball workouts have begun. I'm doing well and starting to enjoy my house. I might put down a couple hundred bucks worth of carpet to last me until I can afford hardwood for the whole place, though.
Thursday, January 20, 2011
Of Tiger Moms and Baseball
The Battle Hymn of the Tiger Mother is making quite a stir these days. For those who haven't heard of it, the book is a memoir that defends what the author describes as a "Chinese" way of raising kids.
http://online.wsj.com/article/SB10001424052748704111504576059713528698754.html
Basically, kids are expected to be high achievers, and that a parent is justified in using methods that others might consider extreme in order to achieve that goal. For instance, 4 hours of piano practice, without a bathroom or meal break, is one of the anectdotes in the book.
The author has been the subject of considerably hostility. Apparently, some folks have even threatened her with violence of some sort or another.
I'm loathe to claim much knowledge in the area of parenting. Yet, I find myself disagreeing with this woman's stance. The hypocrasy of this does not escape me: I chastise a woman for claiming a superior method of parenting, at the same time, believing that some of her methods are inferior.
Let me start with my biggest problem with her book: it works from the premise that her method produced superior kids.
There are a few nits to pick with this. Number one is that her kids are still teenagers. It's a bit premature to roll out the "mission accomplished" banner. In fact, what we know of development of the brain suggests that parts of it are still developing well into the mid 20s. So, it's going to be some years before we know whether this method worked or not.
Second, sorry, but this is a Harvard Law educated woman who teaches at Yale Law School. Her husband is similarly brilliant. I'm one of the folks who believes that genetics has a lot to do with a person's achievement in life. She won the genetic lottery and by extension, so did her daughters.
If they had been raised by a longshoreman, they'd still be brilliant.
The basic question comes down to this, though: what is the goal of parenting?
That's a question folks can only answer for themselves.
As some of you know, I have mixed feelings about travel baseball and the issues it raises are similar to the discussion this book raises.
I still remember Logan's first day of tee-ball practice. I was helping coach some of the kids, and I heard somebody say, "Jim, come over here, Logan just got hit in the face with the ball."
Luckily, tee ball is played with a softer baseball. I sat Logan on my knee and he regained his composure. I asked if he wanted to keep playing and he didn't even hesitate. He ran back to join the other kids.
A few minutes later, "Jim, Logan got hit in the face with the ball again."
I can't tell you exactly what I was thinking at the moment, but I think it was something along the lines of, "Oh f***ity f***ing f***."
Went over and sat him on my knee, he regained his composure and again, went right back out to play.
After that practice, I hated myself. I hated myself for not preparing him. I don't know how in the world Logan was the lucky kid who got hit in the face not once, but twice, but it happened.
So, I immediately bought a tennis balls and some wiffle balls and started to teach him how to catch a ball with a baseball glove.
I worked with him a little bit, but his biggest improvement came when he would practice by himself at night. He would take a wiffle ball and throw it against the front door and field it with his glove. A wiffle ball gives you no feedback in the glove, so it's 100% hand-eye practice. I liken it to trying to catch a flying BB with tweezers.
Hours every night he practiced. I never had to push him towards it, encourage him to do it or even mention it to him. He just loved doing it.
Fast forward to the modern day and Logan has made our city's premier travel baseball team.
I'm lukewarm to the idea of travel baseball. Logan's mom brought up to me last year that Logan might not want to play travel this year. I told her, flat-out, I didn't care if Logan played rec league ball, or if he never touched a baseball glove again for the rest of his life. My only line in the sand was that he had to finish out the season because we had made a committment to the team.
Is baseball important? Well, yeah, I think it is. I probably think it's more important than a lot of things in life.
However, I also know that there are dads who are pushing their kids into travel baseball because they think their kid is going to play in the major leagues someday.
There are fewer than 1,000 players in major league baseball. They are recruited from all over the world. Not every country plays baseball, but seriously, we're probably talking a third or a quarter of the world's population has access to baseball.
I would LOVE it if Logan played MLB someday. However, I'm putting a little more effort into making sure he has a strong plan B.
Other dads are pushing their boys into travel baseball because they think it's the only way the kid will ever make their high school team.
To that, I say, "so what?" If they don't make their high school baseball team, they can still live fulfilling lives as productive members of society.
Should I be pushing him in baseball? I don't think so. I think that childhood is a time when he should be exploring a lot of different activities and options. He may not like baseball. Maybe he'll run track and cross country in High School. Maybe, heaven forbid, he won't play sports at all.
If he excels in baseball in High School and beyond, it'll be because he pushes himself. It'll be because he's one of those kids who practices even when they don't have to.
Logan can play travel baseball as long as he loves doing it. When it turns into a chore, he will have the option of doing something else. He's 9 years old and that's too young to have a job.
Amy Chua (the Tiger Mother) is proud of her daughters for having achieved excellence in piano and violin. The girls should be proud of their accomplishments.
On the other hand, I'd have to ask, "So what?" Why is it important to excel at piano and violin? Are they going to be professional musicians? If not, then seriously, what was all that work for? If it was because the girls loved it, that's one thing.
If it's because they had to, and had no choice, and their hours of piano practice kept them from enjoying a lot of the typical activities that form the warm memories of childhood, then sorry, I disagree with making them do it.
This is not to say that I'm pro-sports and anti-music. Far from it. I'm actually one of the least athletic people you'll ever meet.
I'm teaching my son basketball right now and frankly, I know a lot about the game. My son asked why I know so much about it, despite not-playing in High School, and I told him bluntly, "Because I wasn't very talented, I had to learn everything I could about how the game is played".
It didn't matter much. I never once made a middle school basketball team, and played only a couple of years of CYO. Sometimes, sorry, genetics trumps a love of the game, even when you're a 5'11" 7th grader.
I also happen to love music. I taught myself to play guitar starting at age 16, and studied applied classical guitar in college. I also taught guitar for 3 years.
In my personal story, I would have been a kid who practiced 4 hours a day. My family simply couldn't afford instruments or music lessons. I asked for them starting in about the 2nd grade and kept up the asking until about the 4th, at which point it became obvious that it just wasn't going to happen.
When I was old enough to buy my own guitar, I did, and practiced constantly. I did this from the time I was 16 until about the time I left college in Texas at age 25.
You can't make up for lost time on something like this. I would clearly have been a much better musician if I had the resources to start earlier.
So, is that an argument for the Tiger Mom? No, it isn't. What if I didn't want to play the violin? What if I were like my son and wasn't musically inclined, but athletically inclined?
The Tiger Mom might have worked out in my case, probably. I would have loved to have learned how to play the piano. But the fact that she was oblivious to listening to her kids means that it probably wouldn't have worked out for most kids, most of the time.
Ultimately, popular music is not made with violins, and to an increasing degree, not with guitars, either. Classical music is something that appeals to a lot of people if it's in the background, like Muzak. Beyond that, it doesn't impact the lives of most people.
So, is music unimportant? Is baseball unimportant? They're both very important each in their own way. Which one should you push your kid into? Neither, but you should facilitate their ability to pursue the one they'll love. And you can't find out which one they love if you're shoving other activities down their throats.
Getting back to basketball, Logan recently tried out for the city's premier basketball team and didn't make the cut. It was a flashback to the first day of tee-ball practice. He didn't succeed because I hadn't prepared him. I only heard about the tryouts the week or so before. Had I been able to put Logan through a few workouts, he may have made the squad.
Am I worried? Is he doomed? Will the players on the team outpace him? Will he never make his High School team? The reality of this is that he probably has the physical skills to make his High School team. If he makes it, it will be because he worked hard at it, for years, and not because he was forced to. I can haul him to the warehouse to shoot hoops once or twice a week, but the kids who make the HS team will be the ones who are practicing a few hours, multiple times a week, all Summer long.
He'll make it if he has the love. If he doesn't, he won't. And either way is fine with me. I'll help him, but I won't stand over him and force him. He's got to want it for himself.
Ultimately, we all want to raise well-adjusted, competent, contributing members of society. We're all going to go about it each in our own way. No method works for raising all kids.
My boy is a people pleaser. He doesn't rebel. He's not mischievous. Me? I was all that. You don't raise a boy like my boy the way you have to raise somebody like I was.
Kids are individuals, and there is something inside there. There's a human being with likes and dislikes. In my opinion, a successful parent is one who allows the child room to explore and grow, and to become a person they want to be, not just a person they have to be.
I don't agree with trying to force a kid into our image of what they should be. Whether that's a piano-playing science-fair winning high achiever, or a kid who throws a 90 mph fastball.
There are hard limits, of course. We want our children to be moral. We want our children to do SOMETHING with their lives. However, micromanaging their lives into a very, very, very narrow set of experiences is not something I believe in doing.
http://online.wsj.com/article/SB10001424052748704111504576059713528698754.html
Basically, kids are expected to be high achievers, and that a parent is justified in using methods that others might consider extreme in order to achieve that goal. For instance, 4 hours of piano practice, without a bathroom or meal break, is one of the anectdotes in the book.
The author has been the subject of considerably hostility. Apparently, some folks have even threatened her with violence of some sort or another.
I'm loathe to claim much knowledge in the area of parenting. Yet, I find myself disagreeing with this woman's stance. The hypocrasy of this does not escape me: I chastise a woman for claiming a superior method of parenting, at the same time, believing that some of her methods are inferior.
Let me start with my biggest problem with her book: it works from the premise that her method produced superior kids.
There are a few nits to pick with this. Number one is that her kids are still teenagers. It's a bit premature to roll out the "mission accomplished" banner. In fact, what we know of development of the brain suggests that parts of it are still developing well into the mid 20s. So, it's going to be some years before we know whether this method worked or not.
Second, sorry, but this is a Harvard Law educated woman who teaches at Yale Law School. Her husband is similarly brilliant. I'm one of the folks who believes that genetics has a lot to do with a person's achievement in life. She won the genetic lottery and by extension, so did her daughters.
If they had been raised by a longshoreman, they'd still be brilliant.
The basic question comes down to this, though: what is the goal of parenting?
That's a question folks can only answer for themselves.
As some of you know, I have mixed feelings about travel baseball and the issues it raises are similar to the discussion this book raises.
I still remember Logan's first day of tee-ball practice. I was helping coach some of the kids, and I heard somebody say, "Jim, come over here, Logan just got hit in the face with the ball."
Luckily, tee ball is played with a softer baseball. I sat Logan on my knee and he regained his composure. I asked if he wanted to keep playing and he didn't even hesitate. He ran back to join the other kids.
A few minutes later, "Jim, Logan got hit in the face with the ball again."
I can't tell you exactly what I was thinking at the moment, but I think it was something along the lines of, "Oh f***ity f***ing f***."
Went over and sat him on my knee, he regained his composure and again, went right back out to play.
After that practice, I hated myself. I hated myself for not preparing him. I don't know how in the world Logan was the lucky kid who got hit in the face not once, but twice, but it happened.
So, I immediately bought a tennis balls and some wiffle balls and started to teach him how to catch a ball with a baseball glove.
I worked with him a little bit, but his biggest improvement came when he would practice by himself at night. He would take a wiffle ball and throw it against the front door and field it with his glove. A wiffle ball gives you no feedback in the glove, so it's 100% hand-eye practice. I liken it to trying to catch a flying BB with tweezers.
Hours every night he practiced. I never had to push him towards it, encourage him to do it or even mention it to him. He just loved doing it.
Fast forward to the modern day and Logan has made our city's premier travel baseball team.
I'm lukewarm to the idea of travel baseball. Logan's mom brought up to me last year that Logan might not want to play travel this year. I told her, flat-out, I didn't care if Logan played rec league ball, or if he never touched a baseball glove again for the rest of his life. My only line in the sand was that he had to finish out the season because we had made a committment to the team.
Is baseball important? Well, yeah, I think it is. I probably think it's more important than a lot of things in life.
However, I also know that there are dads who are pushing their kids into travel baseball because they think their kid is going to play in the major leagues someday.
There are fewer than 1,000 players in major league baseball. They are recruited from all over the world. Not every country plays baseball, but seriously, we're probably talking a third or a quarter of the world's population has access to baseball.
I would LOVE it if Logan played MLB someday. However, I'm putting a little more effort into making sure he has a strong plan B.
Other dads are pushing their boys into travel baseball because they think it's the only way the kid will ever make their high school team.
To that, I say, "so what?" If they don't make their high school baseball team, they can still live fulfilling lives as productive members of society.
Should I be pushing him in baseball? I don't think so. I think that childhood is a time when he should be exploring a lot of different activities and options. He may not like baseball. Maybe he'll run track and cross country in High School. Maybe, heaven forbid, he won't play sports at all.
If he excels in baseball in High School and beyond, it'll be because he pushes himself. It'll be because he's one of those kids who practices even when they don't have to.
Logan can play travel baseball as long as he loves doing it. When it turns into a chore, he will have the option of doing something else. He's 9 years old and that's too young to have a job.
Amy Chua (the Tiger Mother) is proud of her daughters for having achieved excellence in piano and violin. The girls should be proud of their accomplishments.
On the other hand, I'd have to ask, "So what?" Why is it important to excel at piano and violin? Are they going to be professional musicians? If not, then seriously, what was all that work for? If it was because the girls loved it, that's one thing.
If it's because they had to, and had no choice, and their hours of piano practice kept them from enjoying a lot of the typical activities that form the warm memories of childhood, then sorry, I disagree with making them do it.
This is not to say that I'm pro-sports and anti-music. Far from it. I'm actually one of the least athletic people you'll ever meet.
I'm teaching my son basketball right now and frankly, I know a lot about the game. My son asked why I know so much about it, despite not-playing in High School, and I told him bluntly, "Because I wasn't very talented, I had to learn everything I could about how the game is played".
It didn't matter much. I never once made a middle school basketball team, and played only a couple of years of CYO. Sometimes, sorry, genetics trumps a love of the game, even when you're a 5'11" 7th grader.
I also happen to love music. I taught myself to play guitar starting at age 16, and studied applied classical guitar in college. I also taught guitar for 3 years.
In my personal story, I would have been a kid who practiced 4 hours a day. My family simply couldn't afford instruments or music lessons. I asked for them starting in about the 2nd grade and kept up the asking until about the 4th, at which point it became obvious that it just wasn't going to happen.
When I was old enough to buy my own guitar, I did, and practiced constantly. I did this from the time I was 16 until about the time I left college in Texas at age 25.
You can't make up for lost time on something like this. I would clearly have been a much better musician if I had the resources to start earlier.
So, is that an argument for the Tiger Mom? No, it isn't. What if I didn't want to play the violin? What if I were like my son and wasn't musically inclined, but athletically inclined?
The Tiger Mom might have worked out in my case, probably. I would have loved to have learned how to play the piano. But the fact that she was oblivious to listening to her kids means that it probably wouldn't have worked out for most kids, most of the time.
Ultimately, popular music is not made with violins, and to an increasing degree, not with guitars, either. Classical music is something that appeals to a lot of people if it's in the background, like Muzak. Beyond that, it doesn't impact the lives of most people.
So, is music unimportant? Is baseball unimportant? They're both very important each in their own way. Which one should you push your kid into? Neither, but you should facilitate their ability to pursue the one they'll love. And you can't find out which one they love if you're shoving other activities down their throats.
Getting back to basketball, Logan recently tried out for the city's premier basketball team and didn't make the cut. It was a flashback to the first day of tee-ball practice. He didn't succeed because I hadn't prepared him. I only heard about the tryouts the week or so before. Had I been able to put Logan through a few workouts, he may have made the squad.
Am I worried? Is he doomed? Will the players on the team outpace him? Will he never make his High School team? The reality of this is that he probably has the physical skills to make his High School team. If he makes it, it will be because he worked hard at it, for years, and not because he was forced to. I can haul him to the warehouse to shoot hoops once or twice a week, but the kids who make the HS team will be the ones who are practicing a few hours, multiple times a week, all Summer long.
He'll make it if he has the love. If he doesn't, he won't. And either way is fine with me. I'll help him, but I won't stand over him and force him. He's got to want it for himself.
Ultimately, we all want to raise well-adjusted, competent, contributing members of society. We're all going to go about it each in our own way. No method works for raising all kids.
My boy is a people pleaser. He doesn't rebel. He's not mischievous. Me? I was all that. You don't raise a boy like my boy the way you have to raise somebody like I was.
Kids are individuals, and there is something inside there. There's a human being with likes and dislikes. In my opinion, a successful parent is one who allows the child room to explore and grow, and to become a person they want to be, not just a person they have to be.
I don't agree with trying to force a kid into our image of what they should be. Whether that's a piano-playing science-fair winning high achiever, or a kid who throws a 90 mph fastball.
There are hard limits, of course. We want our children to be moral. We want our children to do SOMETHING with their lives. However, micromanaging their lives into a very, very, very narrow set of experiences is not something I believe in doing.
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