Divorce

One of many unpleasant midlife experiences is divorce.  I'll be finalizing mine, soon.  The soon-to-be-ex (STBX) and I have worked out a basic, informal, verbal separation and I bought my own house a couple of years ago.  It worked well enough for quite a while, but the agreement is starting to fray.  I had extended an offer that she get an attorney and draw up an agreement favorable to her and if I could afford it at all, I'd sign off.  However, now that the agreement is unravelling, I need to get everything official to protect myself.

More importantly, I need to get this thing done and in the past so I can get on with my life.  I visited the attorney and have paid his initial retainer.  I had to laugh:  the last time I saw him was in 2007.  Obviously, I dropped it in the hope of working on a reconciliation, and the past couple of years, because the informal separation we'd worked out was working well enough, I didn't think there was any urgency to this, but there really is.

I also need to give a shout-out to my Dad.  I don't know how he does it, but he's helping me quite a bit through this.  You really know what's important in your life when the chips are down and you really need help.  A friend in need is a friend, indeed.

My life could really take a turn for the worse, here.  The business is failing.  If it goes down, that not only makes things difficult financially, but will probably lead to bankruptcy.  Without a means of income, I don't see how I can continue to go to law school.  I'ld lose my house, probably.  Which would make me a 40-something unemployed guy with no place to live. 

Anything can happen in this business.  However, the clear trend since the downturn is that things are getting worse, not better.  I started law school with the hope that the biz could keep afloat to graduation, however, there was never any guarantee that it would. 

Of course, things could turn around.  All I can do is focus on the things I can do something about. 

I need to finish out the semester, no matter what.  If things turn around, I may be able to finish at University of Toledo.  If they don't and I have to relocate elsewhere, I would have some hope of being able to transfer and continue at a different school.

I need to try to keep the business afloat until the end of the semester.  At that point, I need to sit down and evaluate whether the thing can continue to survive on its own, or whether it's time to pull the plug.  I can't keep doubling down on this.  It's killing me in so many ways.

Not sure what I'll be doing this time next year, but right now, it's all sort of up in the air.  I'll just keep plugging away as best I can.