2013 the Rebuilding Year

They used to have an expression in pro sports when I was a kid.  When a team was just absolutely horrible, with no chance of success, they'd say they were in a "rebuilding year".  In theory, that meant that they were writing off the current season, but were executing moves that would make the team stronger in the future.  In reality, it usually just meant that the team was terrible, with no real prospects of getting better.

For me, 2012 was the year of destruction.  So many things just crashed and burned.  Some of the events were interconnected.  Some weren't.  It was as though everything bad that could have happened, did, though, all together.

I do try to keep perspective.  I'm healthy and my son is truly a joy.  As long as those things are true, it's hard to say that things are bad. 

The difficulty with everything in your life crashing is that it doesn't happen in a series of instataneous, discreet events.  It happens in a cascade of slow-motion train wrecks that you're powerless to stop.  You just have to sit back, watch it happen, and look forward to the day when you can pick up the pieces and move on.

In the next few months, though, a few of those train-wrecks will be over.  I'll have closure and resolution and can start moving forward again.  I won't say the worst of it is over, but its getting there.

I have plans and contingencies from this point forward.  For the most part, I am relatively sure (at least as sure as I can be) that things will be okay.  Regardless of how things play out from here on out, I have ways to get through.  Not all of them are pretty.  Not all of them are optimal.  None of them are easy.  But I have a way to get through.

I also got some good news this week.  I hit my diamond level on Best Western Rewards.  I stay at a hotel when I'm in Dayton.  It is actually cheaper than getting an apartment and/or room-mate and it comes with odd conveniences.  The hotel staff all recognize me on sight.  It feels strangely like my home when I'm down there. 

I try to stay positive.  It's not always easy.  I am basically rebuilding from scratch, but in a way, that's not so bad.  Some folks are really in a deep hole with no real plan to get out.  The biggest difference for me is that I have hope, now.  I have something to work for and towards.  I have something to aspire to. 

As long as I have that, I'm usually happy.