Okay, reader's digest on my life over the past few years:
1. Perfect life until about 2009, when a combination of factors started taking the business down.
2. Everything came to a head in 2012. The biz died, the divorce became inevitable. Had to take a job in Dayton, where I work, now.
I am so very grateful for the job I have, now. I got it during a time when a good many folks were having difficulty finding work. It pays fine. Benefits are insane. I love the people I work with.
But I love my son so much more. So, I never did get a place down in Dayton. I just stay in a cheap hotel when I'm down there.
So many times, I've driven back and forth for football games and whatnot. I drive about 50,000 miles a year. That's just a lot of driving. Averages about a thousand miles a week. And I don't like it.
Anyway, long and short of it was that I could have made my life easier by moving to Dayton, and just touching base with my son now and then. But what sort of life would that have been? He's the most important thing in my life.
Anyway, there's every indication that starting in January, I may be starting a teaching job in Toledo. If I get it, I can give up this horrible life on the road. I can hardly wait.
For those of you who have followed me through my ups and downs (and pretty much only downs since 2009... the two exceptions are the job and the son), this is a pretty big up.
For the first time in 7 years, I feel like I finally will have my life back.
I'm not going to lie: it's been a shitty slog. I can't wait for it to end.
I also know that mine is just one of millions of stories of people who have struggled, some much worse than I have, since the economy cratered.
For the first time in a long, time, though, I have hope and plans and am looking forward to how my life will play itself out. It feels good after so many years of just praying for bare survival.
Wednesday, October 7, 2015
Monday, May 25, 2015
Terraform Your Own Planet
Science fiction writers often write of a future where humans have destroyed the earth's ecology, rendering it unfit for us. We then trek out into space to try and find suitable planets to live on. Over the years, we've come to realize that nearly no planet will ever duplicate the conditions on earth. However, another sci-fi concept: terraforming, has entered the literary lexicon.
The idea being that you take a planet like Mars, but then you add oxygen and an atmosphere, etc. Scientists will tell you that this may be feasible in a universe where there are limitless amounts of energy and resources, but it is essentially impossible in practice.
Then, most scientists will say: if we had the capability to terraform an environment as hostile as Mars, we could terraform a "ruined" Earth much, much more easily.
So, the answer, once you gain terraforming technology, is to terraform the planet you are on. It's way cheaper, easier and faster than terraforming a distant, hostile planet. If having to chose between limiting greenhouse gasses on earth, or turning Mars' atmosphere into one we could live in, there is one clear winner of an idea, and one clearly idiotic idea in the mix. If we can't even save our own planet with modest changes, the likelihood of changing an alien world are essentially zero.
So, I'm going to say that at my age, I've come to realize that the secret to happiness or even survival is to terraform the life you have. Thinking about terraforming some distant life is essentially impossible.
Others have stated it as, "the grass may be greener over there, but it's a lot easier to just water the grass where you are."
My son is starting High School next year. 4 more years, and, if I have anything to say about it, he'll be off to college, on his own. I think going away to school is a great experience for young people. I don't judge folks who don't do it. Not everybody has the same means. And not every kid is the same. But generally speaking, if a kid can do it, I think going away to school is a great thing to do. I also think you have to do it shortly after high school. It's not something you can chose to do in your mid 20s or later. For a kid to gain the maximum formative effects of it, it should be done when they are relatively young.
I am at a paradox in my life. I can't say that my current situation is particularly comfortable. So, part of me is looking forward to a day in the medium-term future, where things are a lot easier financially, and I'm not so worn out all the time trying to balance my work life in Dayton and my home life 2.5 hours away in Toledo.
Dammit, though, these are the last four years of my son as a child. I don't want to let this time pass to quickly. I want to drink it in as much as possible. I have 4 more years of my son as a young man, then he will be off to make his own way in the world.
Someday, I hope he has a family of his own and I will be able to spend time with grandkids. That would be a great way to spend the last years of my life.
My future is pretty clear, and probably going to be really, really good. I am so incredibly blessed to have a great job that pays fairly. (And when I consider that they hired a guy in his late 40s into a program intended for kids in their 20s, I want to kiss the ground in gratitude. Nobody else does that. Nobody.) I will have a pension, some substantial savings, and social security. My life after retirement will probably be easier, financially, than all but a handful of my working years were.
Year by year, things will continue to get easier, too. Once bambino is off to college, I won't have to live 2.5 hours away from where I work anymore.
So, in 4 years, my life will change immensely. I'll finally have the time for both fitness and music that I sorely wish I had today.
4 years after that, he'll be done with school. (Or at least done with Dad paying for it.) From there on out, my finances will be pretty comfortable until retirement.
So, I have a lot to look forward to. I can't say I'm happy about a lot of the ways my life has turned out. I took a pretty bad beating in 2012. In a recent training session, a lecturer asked, "In the past 3 years, how many people here have suffered the loss of a job? Financial setbacks? Death of a loved one? Having to move? Having to start a job with a new company? Divorce?"
I raised my hand.
Not because I've had one of those things happen to me.
Because I have had EVERY ONE of those things happen to me in the past 3 years. Like kharma was sitting back saying, "You know, you've had a good run, Streb, but there's some long overdue dues you're going to pay and you're going to pay them all at once. Right now."
So, I can't say that I like my life the way it is at the moment.
On the other hand, I can't move to Mars and terraform the place. I have one life. Each passing year is a gift I will never get to have again.
I have the best kid I could have ever imagined. I have a job I love. It would be nice if they were in the same place, but they aren't.
There are those who have had it much worse. Not just in the past 3 years, but in life. Many folks would look at my life and say, "Wow... you think THAT is bad? That's nothing man. Let me tell you a story." And they would be right. They would be 100% right.
So, I'm working on terraforming the life I have. Trying to make it as good as I can make it.
Another thing, though, is that I'm already feeling a sense of loss for what life will be once bambino moves out. Yes, I will be able to fill my life with fitness and music. Those, other than my son, are probably the two most important activities to me, personally.
Still, I'll feel a little lost, I know. I love sports and having a kid who plays every sport under the sun has been a great experience. I get to not only watch a lot of sports, but I have an athlete that I genuinely love.
Anyway, I'm an overthinker. Always have been. Always will be. I guess I should just be thankful for today. Logan is hurt at the moment, but his team plays so many games, it's not the worst thing that he gets a little mid-season break. (Especially with school still in session.)
I'm finally getting to put some of my musical gear to use with Logan's band getting ready to play their middle school talent show. I'm excited to see that. He's been working hard at playing bass. He's still doing just fine in school. Mostly, he's just a good human being.
I have been truly blessed. I need to focus more on that, and less on the idea that these years have not turned out at all like I would have planned.
Then, I need to get busy with continually terraforming my world.
The idea being that you take a planet like Mars, but then you add oxygen and an atmosphere, etc. Scientists will tell you that this may be feasible in a universe where there are limitless amounts of energy and resources, but it is essentially impossible in practice.
Then, most scientists will say: if we had the capability to terraform an environment as hostile as Mars, we could terraform a "ruined" Earth much, much more easily.
So, the answer, once you gain terraforming technology, is to terraform the planet you are on. It's way cheaper, easier and faster than terraforming a distant, hostile planet. If having to chose between limiting greenhouse gasses on earth, or turning Mars' atmosphere into one we could live in, there is one clear winner of an idea, and one clearly idiotic idea in the mix. If we can't even save our own planet with modest changes, the likelihood of changing an alien world are essentially zero.
So, I'm going to say that at my age, I've come to realize that the secret to happiness or even survival is to terraform the life you have. Thinking about terraforming some distant life is essentially impossible.
Others have stated it as, "the grass may be greener over there, but it's a lot easier to just water the grass where you are."
My son is starting High School next year. 4 more years, and, if I have anything to say about it, he'll be off to college, on his own. I think going away to school is a great experience for young people. I don't judge folks who don't do it. Not everybody has the same means. And not every kid is the same. But generally speaking, if a kid can do it, I think going away to school is a great thing to do. I also think you have to do it shortly after high school. It's not something you can chose to do in your mid 20s or later. For a kid to gain the maximum formative effects of it, it should be done when they are relatively young.
I am at a paradox in my life. I can't say that my current situation is particularly comfortable. So, part of me is looking forward to a day in the medium-term future, where things are a lot easier financially, and I'm not so worn out all the time trying to balance my work life in Dayton and my home life 2.5 hours away in Toledo.
Dammit, though, these are the last four years of my son as a child. I don't want to let this time pass to quickly. I want to drink it in as much as possible. I have 4 more years of my son as a young man, then he will be off to make his own way in the world.
Someday, I hope he has a family of his own and I will be able to spend time with grandkids. That would be a great way to spend the last years of my life.
My future is pretty clear, and probably going to be really, really good. I am so incredibly blessed to have a great job that pays fairly. (And when I consider that they hired a guy in his late 40s into a program intended for kids in their 20s, I want to kiss the ground in gratitude. Nobody else does that. Nobody.) I will have a pension, some substantial savings, and social security. My life after retirement will probably be easier, financially, than all but a handful of my working years were.
Year by year, things will continue to get easier, too. Once bambino is off to college, I won't have to live 2.5 hours away from where I work anymore.
So, in 4 years, my life will change immensely. I'll finally have the time for both fitness and music that I sorely wish I had today.
4 years after that, he'll be done with school. (Or at least done with Dad paying for it.) From there on out, my finances will be pretty comfortable until retirement.
So, I have a lot to look forward to. I can't say I'm happy about a lot of the ways my life has turned out. I took a pretty bad beating in 2012. In a recent training session, a lecturer asked, "In the past 3 years, how many people here have suffered the loss of a job? Financial setbacks? Death of a loved one? Having to move? Having to start a job with a new company? Divorce?"
I raised my hand.
Not because I've had one of those things happen to me.
Because I have had EVERY ONE of those things happen to me in the past 3 years. Like kharma was sitting back saying, "You know, you've had a good run, Streb, but there's some long overdue dues you're going to pay and you're going to pay them all at once. Right now."
So, I can't say that I like my life the way it is at the moment.
On the other hand, I can't move to Mars and terraform the place. I have one life. Each passing year is a gift I will never get to have again.
I have the best kid I could have ever imagined. I have a job I love. It would be nice if they were in the same place, but they aren't.
There are those who have had it much worse. Not just in the past 3 years, but in life. Many folks would look at my life and say, "Wow... you think THAT is bad? That's nothing man. Let me tell you a story." And they would be right. They would be 100% right.
So, I'm working on terraforming the life I have. Trying to make it as good as I can make it.
Another thing, though, is that I'm already feeling a sense of loss for what life will be once bambino moves out. Yes, I will be able to fill my life with fitness and music. Those, other than my son, are probably the two most important activities to me, personally.
Still, I'll feel a little lost, I know. I love sports and having a kid who plays every sport under the sun has been a great experience. I get to not only watch a lot of sports, but I have an athlete that I genuinely love.
Anyway, I'm an overthinker. Always have been. Always will be. I guess I should just be thankful for today. Logan is hurt at the moment, but his team plays so many games, it's not the worst thing that he gets a little mid-season break. (Especially with school still in session.)
I'm finally getting to put some of my musical gear to use with Logan's band getting ready to play their middle school talent show. I'm excited to see that. He's been working hard at playing bass. He's still doing just fine in school. Mostly, he's just a good human being.
I have been truly blessed. I need to focus more on that, and less on the idea that these years have not turned out at all like I would have planned.
Then, I need to get busy with continually terraforming my world.
Sunday, March 22, 2015
Spring is Here!
I'm so very happy that Spring is here and the outdoors are no longer a hostile, foreign environment. I swear every time I left a building, I was half expecting somebody to warn me that my tauntaun would freeze before I reached the first marker. I'm pretty sure I froze my tauntauns off on more than one occasion.
So, updates on all the news that's fit to print. Baseball season is kicking off in high gear. Bambino is on a new team, now. I am a little nervous about it, but I figure in the long run, he'll be fine. This team is, hands-down, the best team he's ever been on. They play a tournament every single weekend of the season except one. Then, add a couple of midweek games and all told, he's going to basically average about a game a day from mid April to mid July.
There's a big tournament in Myrtle Beach to cap off the entire season. So, that's vacation for the year.
I'm excited for Bambino and my goal with all this travel baseball was to prepare him to play in High School. Doing the math, looking at the available players and talking to other parents, I think we can all but roll out the mission accomplished banner on this one.
I think he has all the tools he will need to play in High School. If he wants to put in the work, he can continue to excel. Even if he continues to play other sports, he should still have a good HS career, and eventually play varsity.
So, that's the payoff. That's all I really wanted with all the travel ball. Like most stuff in life, if I had it all to do over, I'd do it differently. However, it's done, now, and the result is what I'd hoped for. Bambino continues to be a heck of a good ballplayer.
Fencing season is pretty much over for me until late Summer 2015. It's as good a time as any for a break. There is just no real way I can do any tournaments until baseball season is over. It was time for a break, anyway.
I'm very, very happy with my progress over the past 8 months. I started out basically only knowing how to do one thing (beat the hell out of a blade, close distance and stab like a madman.) Now, I'm evolving a style that's pretty far removed from that. I'm getting tons of glove and forearm touches, even in tournaments. So, I'm using a lot more finesse these days.
Next year, I hope to combine my blade control / sniping ability with the aggression I started out with. Try to combine it with some better attempts at binding and controlling the opponent's blade and see how it goes.
I'm going to also try french grip. If it works out the way it's planned, that should lead to more touches and improved control. If not, I can always go back to the standard pistol grip (the visconti grip) and continue along the path I was going.
Basketball season is over for the Bambino, now. He's finishing up his rec basketball season. He continues to absolutely love basketball. So, I'm encouraging him to give it his all. Basketball is, by far, the hardest teams to make and the hardest to get a varsity letter in, in high school, IMHO. Baseball is second. (Just personal opinion. Not trying to start a fight with people who have kids in other sports.) He knows he's either going to have to grow or develop a killer 3 if he hopes to play varsity. His ball handling, leaping ability, jump shooting, etc., are phenomenally better than last year. I'm really impressed with his progress. If he improves a comparable amount next year, I think he's going to be in fantastic shape for freshman ball.
Bambino is also thinking he wants to play wide receiver in football. I'm nervous about it. Every parent is these days. It'll be more than a little crazy seeing him suit up for his High School's football team. So far so good. No significant dane brammage that I can see. I will be holding my breath until he finishes his time under the Friday Night Lights uneventfully. Fingers crossed.
I just finished the last of my Defense Acquisition University (yes, there is such a thing) classes required for my Level II certification in Acquisition. (These certifications are under the Defense Acquisition Workforce Improvement Act, or DAWIA.) In July, my 3 year service obligation with the Air Force is over. I am desperately trying to find work closer to home.
I'm a little surprised I've been able to do this for as long as I have. This drive and this situation have just been crazy and I've been doing them for almost 3 years, now. I was in pure survival mode. I'd like to do a little living though.
Until Bambino graduates High School, I want to try and stay here if at all possible. Of course, that may not be possible. I'll just keep playing it by ear. If I have to do this same routine for another 4 years, I'd survive. However, if I could get a job with the VA in Ann Arbor, I'd sure take it.
So, now, the weather is good. I can start running outside again. I'm hoping I'll be able to get back into the shape I was in back in August or so of last year. I did make some gains with weight training over the long Winter, but I've never really liked being big. I'll be very happy to slim back down.
So, updates on all the news that's fit to print. Baseball season is kicking off in high gear. Bambino is on a new team, now. I am a little nervous about it, but I figure in the long run, he'll be fine. This team is, hands-down, the best team he's ever been on. They play a tournament every single weekend of the season except one. Then, add a couple of midweek games and all told, he's going to basically average about a game a day from mid April to mid July.
There's a big tournament in Myrtle Beach to cap off the entire season. So, that's vacation for the year.
I'm excited for Bambino and my goal with all this travel baseball was to prepare him to play in High School. Doing the math, looking at the available players and talking to other parents, I think we can all but roll out the mission accomplished banner on this one.
I think he has all the tools he will need to play in High School. If he wants to put in the work, he can continue to excel. Even if he continues to play other sports, he should still have a good HS career, and eventually play varsity.
So, that's the payoff. That's all I really wanted with all the travel ball. Like most stuff in life, if I had it all to do over, I'd do it differently. However, it's done, now, and the result is what I'd hoped for. Bambino continues to be a heck of a good ballplayer.
Fencing season is pretty much over for me until late Summer 2015. It's as good a time as any for a break. There is just no real way I can do any tournaments until baseball season is over. It was time for a break, anyway.
I'm very, very happy with my progress over the past 8 months. I started out basically only knowing how to do one thing (beat the hell out of a blade, close distance and stab like a madman.) Now, I'm evolving a style that's pretty far removed from that. I'm getting tons of glove and forearm touches, even in tournaments. So, I'm using a lot more finesse these days.
Next year, I hope to combine my blade control / sniping ability with the aggression I started out with. Try to combine it with some better attempts at binding and controlling the opponent's blade and see how it goes.
I'm going to also try french grip. If it works out the way it's planned, that should lead to more touches and improved control. If not, I can always go back to the standard pistol grip (the visconti grip) and continue along the path I was going.
Basketball season is over for the Bambino, now. He's finishing up his rec basketball season. He continues to absolutely love basketball. So, I'm encouraging him to give it his all. Basketball is, by far, the hardest teams to make and the hardest to get a varsity letter in, in high school, IMHO. Baseball is second. (Just personal opinion. Not trying to start a fight with people who have kids in other sports.) He knows he's either going to have to grow or develop a killer 3 if he hopes to play varsity. His ball handling, leaping ability, jump shooting, etc., are phenomenally better than last year. I'm really impressed with his progress. If he improves a comparable amount next year, I think he's going to be in fantastic shape for freshman ball.
Bambino is also thinking he wants to play wide receiver in football. I'm nervous about it. Every parent is these days. It'll be more than a little crazy seeing him suit up for his High School's football team. So far so good. No significant dane brammage that I can see. I will be holding my breath until he finishes his time under the Friday Night Lights uneventfully. Fingers crossed.
I just finished the last of my Defense Acquisition University (yes, there is such a thing) classes required for my Level II certification in Acquisition. (These certifications are under the Defense Acquisition Workforce Improvement Act, or DAWIA.) In July, my 3 year service obligation with the Air Force is over. I am desperately trying to find work closer to home.
I'm a little surprised I've been able to do this for as long as I have. This drive and this situation have just been crazy and I've been doing them for almost 3 years, now. I was in pure survival mode. I'd like to do a little living though.
Until Bambino graduates High School, I want to try and stay here if at all possible. Of course, that may not be possible. I'll just keep playing it by ear. If I have to do this same routine for another 4 years, I'd survive. However, if I could get a job with the VA in Ann Arbor, I'd sure take it.
So, now, the weather is good. I can start running outside again. I'm hoping I'll be able to get back into the shape I was in back in August or so of last year. I did make some gains with weight training over the long Winter, but I've never really liked being big. I'll be very happy to slim back down.
Sunday, January 11, 2015
The Comedic Stylings of Jimmy Trying to Ski
Had 5 days of skiing in the past week. This pretty much equals my total skiing for the years 1995 thru 2012. I never was a very good skier. However, I wanted my son to learn. So, starting when he was about 8, we started hitting the little local places.
This is like a lot of things I took up as an adult where I wish I had known how to do this, but wasn't in a position, financially, to try until I was grown up. Even so, I learned on a budget, which meant that I was probably a dangerous and not-very-good skier for most of my life. I was lucky to afford a lift ticket now and then. Forget affording lessons.
I got to where I could go down a hill, hockey stop if going to the left, and that's... well, that's about it. I'd wipe out several times a day on the slopes and when I'd start wiping out every run, I knew it was time to go home.
I wanted my son to learn how to ski properly. So, I frequently would hire a private instructor for him when we'd hit the slopes.
It's been a few years since I did skiing of any kind. So, when a friend asked if I wanted to hit Snowshoe West Virginia for a week, I was pretty eager for it. I haven't had a real vacation in a long, long time and it was time to dust off the skis.
Snowshoe felt like a skiing Disneyland for grownups. Our Hotel room was a short walk to the top of the slopes. It was close enough that you could walk to the hotel and up to the room if your feet got cold or you had to pee. The feet part was pretty important because the week we were there, it was very, very cold. Like single digits and some negative temperatures.
My friend taught me quite a bit. For instance, I didn't know that the symbols for difficulty aren't universal. They're only in relation to that particular location. So, a green slope just means it's the easiest type of slope at that location. A black diamond in one location could easily be a green elsewhere.
At Snowshoe, the greens were pretty challenging, I think. Most of them had a relatively steep drop-off and were on narrow trails.
The first couple of days, I was mostly just trying not to die. My priorities have changed a lot since I was in my 20s.
In my 20s, my priorities for skiing were:
1. Ski all the black diamonds by the end of the day.
2. Ski fast.
3. Turn roughly when I intend to turn.
4. Stop, or if I can't stop, slide to a stop somewhere near the lift line.
5. When I fall, try not to fall on anybody else, and try to keep the yardsale of gear nearby so it won't take me long to gather it up, put it back on and keep flying down the hill.
Now, my priorities are more like:
1. Don't get hurt.
2. Avoid injury.
3. Attempt not to cause myself or others bodily harm.
4. Endeavor to eschew anything that will result in pain.
5. Enjoy skiing.
So, the first two days I was trying to get myself back to where I could ski like I used to: with some semblance of control and ability to stop and turn. By day four, I was pretty much as good as I'd ever been and was really enjoying the greens. Each run might have 1 or 2 places where the hill got a little steep and I'd have to really work to keep my speed under control, but for the most part, I could practice staying parallel and controlling my speed.
On Saturday, I took Logan up to Mt. Holly to try out his new ski gear. His skis are MUCH longer than last year. I also had some concerns about his boots. However, the night before I had him put the boots on to make sure they weren't too big. I didn't know about the skis, though. If they were too long, they'd be hard to control and he might hurt himself.
So, first thing I did was hire an instructor for an hour. Unlike years prior, I paid extra so it would be a private lesson for the two of us. The instructor gave us some great guidance and stuff to work on and then we were on our own.
Mt. Holly, for a little local hill, is pretty nice. It's an hour and a half away from me. There's a closer one: Mt. Brighton, but Brighton is very, very small and very, very crowded. Much like local places near Cleveland like Brandywine. You spend most of your time dodging out of control kids on snowboards. The hill is small. It's sorta dangerous.
Last time I went to Holly, there were absolutely some hills there that were out of my reach, skill-wise. It's bigger, with more runs and is less populated than Mt. Brighton. For a skiier of my skill level at the time, I could have skied there a week and not gotten bored.
I was having difficulty controlling my skis all week and prior to the lesson. There are a lot of reasons for this. For one, they're giant slolom (GS) skis. Probably not appropriate for kid-dodging east of the Rockies. This means they're a little longer than typical recreational skis. Probably intended for folks who ski a little better than I did.
For another, the skis today have different technology than they did in the early 90s when I first tried skiing. The skis are parabolic, now, which makes them much easier to turn. Thing is, to get them to perform, you have to lean forward in your boots, which scares the heck out of me.
The instructor gave me basically one thing to work on: leaning forward in my boots. With the new parabolic skis, this is critical for engaging the front of the ski for turning.
Once I did this, everything that hadn't worked the prior week snapped right into place. My turn to the right was just as good as my turn to the left. I was able to get my skis left and right to dig them in to control speed on very steep grades.
By the mid-afternoon, Logan and I had safely slayed all the runs at Mt. Holly. And by early evening we were starting to get bored with them. My "too long" skis were not a problem at all. (Not at Holly, anyway. Next season, I will be looking for shorter skis. I just saw way too many skiers who probably weren't as good as me, handling much gnarlier stuff in Snowshoe because their skis were so much more nimble and easy to control.)
I thought back to the stuff that gave me fits at Snowshoe, and with my technique the way it is, now, none of it would be tricky at all for me. So, after 4 days in Snowshoe, I was as good as I ever was. After 1 lesson and a day at Mt. Holly, I'm a better skiier than I ever thought I would be.
I doubt I'll be going back to Snowshoe. Honestly, I loved it, but it's just too danged far. For me, it's like an 8 or 9 hour drive under good conditions. Also, a lot of the drive is winding single-lane roads. Boyne is only 4 and a half hours away and from what I can gather, is pretty much the same skiing as Snowshoe. So, my penciled in plan for next year is Boyne for a week with Logan. Depending on what happens with the job and the rest of my life, a trip out west is probably in the not-too-distant future.
I don't think Boyne has the fake village Disneyland atmosphere of Snowshoe, but that's okay. I liked being able to walk out the door of the hotel to a restaurant within a few yards, but honestly, although the food was usually good, the quality was insanely inconsistent. If I did it again, I'd take a cooler of food and nuke a breakfast sandwich and hit the slopes that much earlier. I'll probably follow that plan in Boyne.
Total damage (non financial) is a little tweak on the shoulder, knee and hip. The shoulder is still a little sore. Hip is fine, now. And knee is still just ever so slightly noticeable. All of this happened prior to the lesson. After the lesson, it was the most uneventful (in terms of falling down) skiing of my life. I should have done the lesson so much sooner. Unlike lessons in a lot of other things, the difference was instant and dramatic. I was ten times the skiier by the end of that day as I'd been when I showed up that morning.
This is like a lot of things I took up as an adult where I wish I had known how to do this, but wasn't in a position, financially, to try until I was grown up. Even so, I learned on a budget, which meant that I was probably a dangerous and not-very-good skier for most of my life. I was lucky to afford a lift ticket now and then. Forget affording lessons.
I got to where I could go down a hill, hockey stop if going to the left, and that's... well, that's about it. I'd wipe out several times a day on the slopes and when I'd start wiping out every run, I knew it was time to go home.
I wanted my son to learn how to ski properly. So, I frequently would hire a private instructor for him when we'd hit the slopes.
It's been a few years since I did skiing of any kind. So, when a friend asked if I wanted to hit Snowshoe West Virginia for a week, I was pretty eager for it. I haven't had a real vacation in a long, long time and it was time to dust off the skis.
Snowshoe felt like a skiing Disneyland for grownups. Our Hotel room was a short walk to the top of the slopes. It was close enough that you could walk to the hotel and up to the room if your feet got cold or you had to pee. The feet part was pretty important because the week we were there, it was very, very cold. Like single digits and some negative temperatures.
My friend taught me quite a bit. For instance, I didn't know that the symbols for difficulty aren't universal. They're only in relation to that particular location. So, a green slope just means it's the easiest type of slope at that location. A black diamond in one location could easily be a green elsewhere.
At Snowshoe, the greens were pretty challenging, I think. Most of them had a relatively steep drop-off and were on narrow trails.
The first couple of days, I was mostly just trying not to die. My priorities have changed a lot since I was in my 20s.
In my 20s, my priorities for skiing were:
1. Ski all the black diamonds by the end of the day.
2. Ski fast.
3. Turn roughly when I intend to turn.
4. Stop, or if I can't stop, slide to a stop somewhere near the lift line.
5. When I fall, try not to fall on anybody else, and try to keep the yardsale of gear nearby so it won't take me long to gather it up, put it back on and keep flying down the hill.
Now, my priorities are more like:
1. Don't get hurt.
2. Avoid injury.
3. Attempt not to cause myself or others bodily harm.
4. Endeavor to eschew anything that will result in pain.
5. Enjoy skiing.
So, the first two days I was trying to get myself back to where I could ski like I used to: with some semblance of control and ability to stop and turn. By day four, I was pretty much as good as I'd ever been and was really enjoying the greens. Each run might have 1 or 2 places where the hill got a little steep and I'd have to really work to keep my speed under control, but for the most part, I could practice staying parallel and controlling my speed.
On Saturday, I took Logan up to Mt. Holly to try out his new ski gear. His skis are MUCH longer than last year. I also had some concerns about his boots. However, the night before I had him put the boots on to make sure they weren't too big. I didn't know about the skis, though. If they were too long, they'd be hard to control and he might hurt himself.
So, first thing I did was hire an instructor for an hour. Unlike years prior, I paid extra so it would be a private lesson for the two of us. The instructor gave us some great guidance and stuff to work on and then we were on our own.
Mt. Holly, for a little local hill, is pretty nice. It's an hour and a half away from me. There's a closer one: Mt. Brighton, but Brighton is very, very small and very, very crowded. Much like local places near Cleveland like Brandywine. You spend most of your time dodging out of control kids on snowboards. The hill is small. It's sorta dangerous.
Last time I went to Holly, there were absolutely some hills there that were out of my reach, skill-wise. It's bigger, with more runs and is less populated than Mt. Brighton. For a skiier of my skill level at the time, I could have skied there a week and not gotten bored.
I was having difficulty controlling my skis all week and prior to the lesson. There are a lot of reasons for this. For one, they're giant slolom (GS) skis. Probably not appropriate for kid-dodging east of the Rockies. This means they're a little longer than typical recreational skis. Probably intended for folks who ski a little better than I did.
For another, the skis today have different technology than they did in the early 90s when I first tried skiing. The skis are parabolic, now, which makes them much easier to turn. Thing is, to get them to perform, you have to lean forward in your boots, which scares the heck out of me.
The instructor gave me basically one thing to work on: leaning forward in my boots. With the new parabolic skis, this is critical for engaging the front of the ski for turning.
Once I did this, everything that hadn't worked the prior week snapped right into place. My turn to the right was just as good as my turn to the left. I was able to get my skis left and right to dig them in to control speed on very steep grades.
By the mid-afternoon, Logan and I had safely slayed all the runs at Mt. Holly. And by early evening we were starting to get bored with them. My "too long" skis were not a problem at all. (Not at Holly, anyway. Next season, I will be looking for shorter skis. I just saw way too many skiers who probably weren't as good as me, handling much gnarlier stuff in Snowshoe because their skis were so much more nimble and easy to control.)
I thought back to the stuff that gave me fits at Snowshoe, and with my technique the way it is, now, none of it would be tricky at all for me. So, after 4 days in Snowshoe, I was as good as I ever was. After 1 lesson and a day at Mt. Holly, I'm a better skiier than I ever thought I would be.
I doubt I'll be going back to Snowshoe. Honestly, I loved it, but it's just too danged far. For me, it's like an 8 or 9 hour drive under good conditions. Also, a lot of the drive is winding single-lane roads. Boyne is only 4 and a half hours away and from what I can gather, is pretty much the same skiing as Snowshoe. So, my penciled in plan for next year is Boyne for a week with Logan. Depending on what happens with the job and the rest of my life, a trip out west is probably in the not-too-distant future.
I don't think Boyne has the fake village Disneyland atmosphere of Snowshoe, but that's okay. I liked being able to walk out the door of the hotel to a restaurant within a few yards, but honestly, although the food was usually good, the quality was insanely inconsistent. If I did it again, I'd take a cooler of food and nuke a breakfast sandwich and hit the slopes that much earlier. I'll probably follow that plan in Boyne.
Total damage (non financial) is a little tweak on the shoulder, knee and hip. The shoulder is still a little sore. Hip is fine, now. And knee is still just ever so slightly noticeable. All of this happened prior to the lesson. After the lesson, it was the most uneventful (in terms of falling down) skiing of my life. I should have done the lesson so much sooner. Unlike lessons in a lot of other things, the difference was instant and dramatic. I was ten times the skiier by the end of that day as I'd been when I showed up that morning.
Thursday, January 1, 2015
Fit at 50 Day One
Weight: 194. (Yikes! A little more weight gain than I wanted, but nothing I can't work with.)
Breakfast:
500 mg. Vitamin C.
1000 mg. Fish Oil.
Centrum Multivitamin.
Orange Juice
3 eggs
5 strips turkey bacon
Coffee
Workout today? Run 2 miles on treadmill at Planet Fitness. 50 kettlebell swings.
Multiple workouts in a day have always worked for me. I have heard people give various theories on this. That it amps up your metabolism. Who knows. Maybe it does.
I usually shoot for multiple workouts during my normal days. One at lunch and one after work. (Usually weights at lunch and run or cardio after.) I don't do this on fencing nights, but fencing is a workout, too. I sweat a lot during fencing. I'm probably getting some fitness benefit from it.
So, that's the plan for today. Also, diet-wise, not much of a plan. Just trying to keep total carb count below 100 grams for the day. During December, that was just going to be flat-out impossible. I wasn't even going to try. But time to get back on it.
I'll check in at the end of the day to report how the actual went against the plan.
Breakfast:
500 mg. Vitamin C.
1000 mg. Fish Oil.
Centrum Multivitamin.
Orange Juice
3 eggs
5 strips turkey bacon
Coffee
Workout today? Run 2 miles on treadmill at Planet Fitness. 50 kettlebell swings.
Multiple workouts in a day have always worked for me. I have heard people give various theories on this. That it amps up your metabolism. Who knows. Maybe it does.
I usually shoot for multiple workouts during my normal days. One at lunch and one after work. (Usually weights at lunch and run or cardio after.) I don't do this on fencing nights, but fencing is a workout, too. I sweat a lot during fencing. I'm probably getting some fitness benefit from it.
So, that's the plan for today. Also, diet-wise, not much of a plan. Just trying to keep total carb count below 100 grams for the day. During December, that was just going to be flat-out impossible. I wasn't even going to try. But time to get back on it.
I'll check in at the end of the day to report how the actual went against the plan.
Wednesday, December 31, 2014
Fit at 50... First Edition
January first has finally rolled around. It's 2015. I honestly don't fully feel like I know how I got here. Yet, here I am.
A year is enough time to change your entire life. I've seen it. I've experienced it. More than once. This year is especially significant since I roll over the 50 mark. Yes, my god, I am that old.
2014 was a transformative year for me. It started like the years before. I was slogging my way through a joyless life. Halfway through the year, I met a person who resonated with me on every wavelength. One thing led to another and by August, I was unrecognizable relative to who I had been in June.
It wasn't that this person pushed me, or encouraged me, or told me I needed to change in any way. They woke me up, though, to who I had been, and to who I was.
The changes were all over, but most noticeably in the area of fitness. Thanks to a workout routine that included free weights, 5 and 6 mile runs and low carb diet, I dropped from about 210 to around 185.
That's roughly where I am, today, though I've probably gained some of the weight back. I gave myself December off. Previous endurance training has given me the belief that you need periodic downtime for your mental and physical well-being. Bodies get beat-up. Hairline fractures start developing. Ligaments and tendonds get strained. Mentally, folks start getting worn down.
December is now officially over. 2015 has begun. In 2014, I was very close to some of the best shape I've ever been in. My bloodwork was phenomenal and I had six pack abs that I would show anybody who wouldn't run away covering their eyes.
I think there's another level beyond that and I think I can hit it in 2015. So, here is what I will be
working on this year:
1. Shoulders, arms, glutes: working on muscling up a little bit. Especially glutes so I don't end up with flabby, flat, old man ass. This is particularly a concern for me since, thanks to my Asian ancestry, I'm gleutially challenged anyway.
2. Abs: I feel like I got these just about right in 2014, but will be working on core strength with a wider variety of exercises in 2015. The bulk of what I've been doing is incline board at several settings, 20 reps per setting, 5 settings, for a total of 100 reps. I do this several times per week. This year, I'll start adding weight to the reps and doing other exercises that hit obliques, etc. and jumbling up the ab exercises with various other routines now and then.
3. Rower and stepper: love both these machines and need to do more of them for overall fitness and cardio, as well as muscle definition in quads, glutes and back.
The rest? I'll be working on definition. Just keeping the weight down, keeping the muscles toned and trying to get them ripped.
Pretty much I'll be doing exactly what I did in 2014... just more of it.
In the low 180s, my body fat was pretty low. I'll be happy to hit that again, but my goal is probably something in the mid 170s. We'll see. Not terribly concerned about the scale, honestly. I'll know when my body fat is where I want it to be. I can see it, feel it, and notice it as I move about.
I have signed up for the Air Force marathon. Though it would benefit me to go into it with as little upper body weight as possible, I'm not in this to win a marathon or even to run one very fast. I'm just not that fast. I'm in it for my overall health and appearance. So, I'll sacrifice a few seconds per mile to carry that extra upper body weight for the race.
Goal for the marathon is simply to complete all my scheduled 20 milers and finish the marathon. Time goal? Don't really have one, but if I had to put a number to it, I'd say a finish in 4:30 or less is just fine with me.
Also, although I'm not much of an athlete, I do have an athletic goal in mind. Now that I have taken up fencing, I want my physical training routine to at least compliment my fencing without detracting.
I'll be posting workout info to facebook and am contemplating some shirtless selfies to show my progress. Nothing like the spectre of public humiliation to aid in achieving a fitness goal. I added a little weight in December, and have the start of a belly. Might do it, might not... I am afraid that a lot of folks just don't want to see some pasty old guy without his shirt when they open their facebook news feed. We'll see... jury is out on that one.
But I will be at least staying in shape and trying to take this to the next level. 2014, of all things, I ended up really amping up my fitness. There's another level beyond that and I think I can hit it. I'll keep you posted as I go.
A year is enough time to change your entire life. I've seen it. I've experienced it. More than once. This year is especially significant since I roll over the 50 mark. Yes, my god, I am that old.
2014 was a transformative year for me. It started like the years before. I was slogging my way through a joyless life. Halfway through the year, I met a person who resonated with me on every wavelength. One thing led to another and by August, I was unrecognizable relative to who I had been in June.
It wasn't that this person pushed me, or encouraged me, or told me I needed to change in any way. They woke me up, though, to who I had been, and to who I was.
The changes were all over, but most noticeably in the area of fitness. Thanks to a workout routine that included free weights, 5 and 6 mile runs and low carb diet, I dropped from about 210 to around 185.
That's roughly where I am, today, though I've probably gained some of the weight back. I gave myself December off. Previous endurance training has given me the belief that you need periodic downtime for your mental and physical well-being. Bodies get beat-up. Hairline fractures start developing. Ligaments and tendonds get strained. Mentally, folks start getting worn down.
December is now officially over. 2015 has begun. In 2014, I was very close to some of the best shape I've ever been in. My bloodwork was phenomenal and I had six pack abs that I would show anybody who wouldn't run away covering their eyes.
I think there's another level beyond that and I think I can hit it in 2015. So, here is what I will be
working on this year:
1. Shoulders, arms, glutes: working on muscling up a little bit. Especially glutes so I don't end up with flabby, flat, old man ass. This is particularly a concern for me since, thanks to my Asian ancestry, I'm gleutially challenged anyway.
2. Abs: I feel like I got these just about right in 2014, but will be working on core strength with a wider variety of exercises in 2015. The bulk of what I've been doing is incline board at several settings, 20 reps per setting, 5 settings, for a total of 100 reps. I do this several times per week. This year, I'll start adding weight to the reps and doing other exercises that hit obliques, etc. and jumbling up the ab exercises with various other routines now and then.
3. Rower and stepper: love both these machines and need to do more of them for overall fitness and cardio, as well as muscle definition in quads, glutes and back.
The rest? I'll be working on definition. Just keeping the weight down, keeping the muscles toned and trying to get them ripped.
Pretty much I'll be doing exactly what I did in 2014... just more of it.
In the low 180s, my body fat was pretty low. I'll be happy to hit that again, but my goal is probably something in the mid 170s. We'll see. Not terribly concerned about the scale, honestly. I'll know when my body fat is where I want it to be. I can see it, feel it, and notice it as I move about.
I have signed up for the Air Force marathon. Though it would benefit me to go into it with as little upper body weight as possible, I'm not in this to win a marathon or even to run one very fast. I'm just not that fast. I'm in it for my overall health and appearance. So, I'll sacrifice a few seconds per mile to carry that extra upper body weight for the race.
Goal for the marathon is simply to complete all my scheduled 20 milers and finish the marathon. Time goal? Don't really have one, but if I had to put a number to it, I'd say a finish in 4:30 or less is just fine with me.
Also, although I'm not much of an athlete, I do have an athletic goal in mind. Now that I have taken up fencing, I want my physical training routine to at least compliment my fencing without detracting.
I'll be posting workout info to facebook and am contemplating some shirtless selfies to show my progress. Nothing like the spectre of public humiliation to aid in achieving a fitness goal. I added a little weight in December, and have the start of a belly. Might do it, might not... I am afraid that a lot of folks just don't want to see some pasty old guy without his shirt when they open their facebook news feed. We'll see... jury is out on that one.
But I will be at least staying in shape and trying to take this to the next level. 2014, of all things, I ended up really amping up my fitness. There's another level beyond that and I think I can hit it. I'll keep you posted as I go.
Saturday, December 27, 2014
Bring on the New Year! 2015 on the way!
Time for New Year's resolutions and here are mine:
1. Stay in shape.
2. Stay debt free.
3. Run a marathon.
4. Play more music.
5. Get a rating in fencing.
6. New job / home / both.
Staying in shape is a pretty modest goal, but I made a lot of progress on fitness this past year. I'd like to keep it. Putting numbers to it, I'd like to keep my weight below 190, with regular workouts. Diet is always problematic for me because of all the time I spend on the road, but as much as possible, I'll try to avoid eating junk. Or at least eat more intelligent junk. If I end 2015 below 190, I'll be pretty happy with this one. My bloodwork is phenomenal and my health is the best it's been in over a decade. I need to keep this up.
Staying debt free should be a little easier. I rent my condo, and will probably rent anyplace I live. So, there's no real need to even have mortgage debt for the time being. The trick will be to avoid buying too many toys. (Or avoid buying toys at all... I don't have time for all the toys I already have.) This is one of those goals that is really just maintaining what I already have, but it will take mindfulness and effort.
Sort of hand-in-hand with staying in shape, I'll be training for a marathon this year. I won't have a time goal. (Though, probably something in the neighborhood of 4:15 to 4:30 is realistic.) One of the reasons 2014 was so awesome fitness-wise is that I have been able to run pain-free for the first time in years and years. So, I'll celebrate that by lacing up the trainers and putting down some real mileage. I have no goals related to running speed at the moment. If this plays out like it did last time I got sorta serious about running, I'll get a big speed bump after my marathon recovery. So, if I have any speed-related goals, they'll need to wait until 2016.
My life has been covered by a veil of general yuckiness since 2012, but that veil is lifting. It's mostly gone at this point. I always feel better when I exercise and play music. So, I need to start playing more music. I'll be setting up my piano and playing a bit here and there. I don't know that I'll perform or record, but I at least want to be regularly playing, now. Maybe 2016, I'll have a recording or performing goal.
I picked up one new hobby in 2015: fencing. I absolutely love it. Started in very late July with some classes at a local community center. I've fenced in half a dozen tournaments this year. If you do well enough in certain types of tournaments, you can get "rated". At this point, I'm rated "u" or unrated. Meaning I haven't achieved anything rating-wise. Sometime in 2016, I'd like to see if I can do well enough in a tournament to get an E in my weapon of choice: epee. Fencing has been a blast and I've been looking for a sport. I guess running is a sport, but this one is a lot of fun in a way that running really isn't. Haha! (Never particularly loved running... I just love everything about running other than the running, itself.)
Lastly, I'll have to make a change this year. I'm hoping to find a job closer to home (Toledo), or if not, then a job closer to family or friends (Dallas, Cleveland or Phoenix.) If I can't do any of those things, I'll be moving down near to Dayton so I can have a more normal semblance of a life. Driving from Toledo to Dayton and paying for hotels has been draining in every imaginable way. I can't really keep it up much longer. Of course, this means I'll have my son for half the Summer, instead of for every other weekend. It's not really better or worse, near as I can figure. It's just a different challenge.
2014 was a great year for me. I'm happier in so many ways. I've met a ton of great people. Had some fantastic experiences. Got in shape. Picked up a new hobby. It was just super all the way around. If I make the same sort of progress in 2015, I'll be pretty darned happy.
Really, my life is mostly back on track, except for two very important things. I don't live close to my son, so I still spend less time with him than I did before my life cratered in 2012. He graduates High School in 2019. I have only so many years with him. So, I want to make the most of it. The clock is ticking on this one and when he graduates High School and is off to college, this chance will have passed. All I can do is continue to do the best I can. Forgive myself for what I can't, and just keep moving forward.
Career-wise, I'm very happy for my job. I love it and am lucky to have it. However, I'm nowhere near where I was, either professionally, or when I owned my own business. That's a work in process.
1. Stay in shape.
2. Stay debt free.
3. Run a marathon.
4. Play more music.
5. Get a rating in fencing.
6. New job / home / both.
Staying in shape is a pretty modest goal, but I made a lot of progress on fitness this past year. I'd like to keep it. Putting numbers to it, I'd like to keep my weight below 190, with regular workouts. Diet is always problematic for me because of all the time I spend on the road, but as much as possible, I'll try to avoid eating junk. Or at least eat more intelligent junk. If I end 2015 below 190, I'll be pretty happy with this one. My bloodwork is phenomenal and my health is the best it's been in over a decade. I need to keep this up.
Staying debt free should be a little easier. I rent my condo, and will probably rent anyplace I live. So, there's no real need to even have mortgage debt for the time being. The trick will be to avoid buying too many toys. (Or avoid buying toys at all... I don't have time for all the toys I already have.) This is one of those goals that is really just maintaining what I already have, but it will take mindfulness and effort.
Sort of hand-in-hand with staying in shape, I'll be training for a marathon this year. I won't have a time goal. (Though, probably something in the neighborhood of 4:15 to 4:30 is realistic.) One of the reasons 2014 was so awesome fitness-wise is that I have been able to run pain-free for the first time in years and years. So, I'll celebrate that by lacing up the trainers and putting down some real mileage. I have no goals related to running speed at the moment. If this plays out like it did last time I got sorta serious about running, I'll get a big speed bump after my marathon recovery. So, if I have any speed-related goals, they'll need to wait until 2016.
My life has been covered by a veil of general yuckiness since 2012, but that veil is lifting. It's mostly gone at this point. I always feel better when I exercise and play music. So, I need to start playing more music. I'll be setting up my piano and playing a bit here and there. I don't know that I'll perform or record, but I at least want to be regularly playing, now. Maybe 2016, I'll have a recording or performing goal.
I picked up one new hobby in 2015: fencing. I absolutely love it. Started in very late July with some classes at a local community center. I've fenced in half a dozen tournaments this year. If you do well enough in certain types of tournaments, you can get "rated". At this point, I'm rated "u" or unrated. Meaning I haven't achieved anything rating-wise. Sometime in 2016, I'd like to see if I can do well enough in a tournament to get an E in my weapon of choice: epee. Fencing has been a blast and I've been looking for a sport. I guess running is a sport, but this one is a lot of fun in a way that running really isn't. Haha! (Never particularly loved running... I just love everything about running other than the running, itself.)
Lastly, I'll have to make a change this year. I'm hoping to find a job closer to home (Toledo), or if not, then a job closer to family or friends (Dallas, Cleveland or Phoenix.) If I can't do any of those things, I'll be moving down near to Dayton so I can have a more normal semblance of a life. Driving from Toledo to Dayton and paying for hotels has been draining in every imaginable way. I can't really keep it up much longer. Of course, this means I'll have my son for half the Summer, instead of for every other weekend. It's not really better or worse, near as I can figure. It's just a different challenge.
2014 was a great year for me. I'm happier in so many ways. I've met a ton of great people. Had some fantastic experiences. Got in shape. Picked up a new hobby. It was just super all the way around. If I make the same sort of progress in 2015, I'll be pretty darned happy.
Really, my life is mostly back on track, except for two very important things. I don't live close to my son, so I still spend less time with him than I did before my life cratered in 2012. He graduates High School in 2019. I have only so many years with him. So, I want to make the most of it. The clock is ticking on this one and when he graduates High School and is off to college, this chance will have passed. All I can do is continue to do the best I can. Forgive myself for what I can't, and just keep moving forward.
Career-wise, I'm very happy for my job. I love it and am lucky to have it. However, I'm nowhere near where I was, either professionally, or when I owned my own business. That's a work in process.
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